The title says it all.
I feel completely, utterly, and irrevocably worthless these days.
I’ve been letting down a lot of people.
They all require energy and attention that I can’t give lately. And they depend on me. It sucks to disappoint those who depend on you. One could even say that I’ve been irresponsible. Not on purpose, but indirectly. Lots of details have gone neglected or forgotten.
I’ve been sick for a month now in one way or another. Different symptoms and different levels of illness, but all with the same end result. They’ve all knocked me out and rendered me useless.
I’ve been unable to properly care for my daughter. I’ve been unable to spend quality time with my husband (unless you count him being my nurse as quality time). I’ve put a lot of pressure on him to take care of damn near everything since I cannot.
I’ve not been able to check-in on my parents and help them out. In fact, it’s been the other way around with my mami being the one checking in on me and helping out.
And my job. I swear at this point I should just take a leave of absence with the amount of days I’ve missed. I just want to be able to work a full week without getting sick.
I’m extremely behind in all aspects of my life and I fear I may never catch up. I have to “take it easy” so that I don’t end up back at the hospital, but taking it easy will not allow for things to get done.
I just want it all to end. I’m sick of being sick. I want normality to come back.