Remembering When

For this week’s Viernes Social, instead of a contest, we’re featuring a heartfelt guest post from a local Latina blogger. I appreciate the post she wrote, as it’s nice to hear about motherhood past the preschool or teenage years.

You’re a young mom. Your days are hectic and seemingly short—not enough hours in the day to do all that demands your attention. Today, I will take you to a different land. We will go back to the future, to a day when most of your parenting duties are over.

That is where I stand today: In the middle of a quieter nest that once was filled with carpooling, after-school activities, sleepovers, Girl Scouts and much more. Just like your days are today.

My daughter, an only child, flew off to college three years ago, and that is the day when things went quiet in our home. I won’t call it an empty nest; after all, there are still two people in it. But it is a different nest.

It’s true that you don’t know how much time and attention you devote to your children until they are gone. There is no free time to calculate it beforehand! Not only do your children occupy your physical time, but also mental space. You are always thinking about them. What are they doing? Do you need to take them somewhere? How about pick them up? And so it goes.

Assuming your child is safely tucked in a dorm somewhere and there are no problems on the horizon, your child will need you a whole lot less. You slowly begin to return to the time—a long, long time ago!—when you could think of yourself without feeling, well, selfish.

You can ponder what you like or what you’re going to do, and it’s totally OK. Go ahead, take a long bubble bath. Nobody will interrupt you. Spend Saturday at the movies either alone or with friends. There is no competing event on your calendar. Take up a new sport or hobby. You have the extra time.

Among the biggest pluses of paying your mommy dues is getting to know your hubby all over again, without the pressure of juggling childrearing, working and household duties. Now, you can look at each other and smile. Hold hands. Have a romantic dinner—or two, or three—during which you’ll spend time remembering when.

Remember the wonderful Christmas we spent in Puerto Rico? Remember when (fill your child’s name) “graduated” from kinder? Remember when she sold the most Girl Scout cookies in her troop? Ahh, I remember it well. It was a very important phase of our lives.

To all the young moms still in the important phase of their lives I say, this shall be your future. It is your reward for caring and loving your family, and putting yourself last all these years.

When you’re in the middle of a bad day, feeling tired and at your wit’s end, take out this post. Read it and smile. Your moment for going back to the future will arrive a lot sooner than you think.