Comments on: Talking Bras with My Four Year Old

By: Raising a Boy vs a Girl - Will Parenting a Boy Bring Different Challenges than Parenting a Girl? — 40weeks Plus

Thu, 02 Dec 2010 14:40:52 +0000

[...] it will be to parent a boy. There are so many things you deal with when raising girls, like talking about bras at the age of four, that I wonder if I’ll have similar challenges with a boy. Perhaps there will be entirely new [...]

By: modernmami

modernmami — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 15:46:00 +0000

Doesn’t raising boys require an entirely different level of discussions,
learning lessons, etc.? I guess I will soon find out. But, yes, I too don’t
remember showing an interest in bras so early and pretty much remember most
of my friends and I dreading that first bra shopping trip. Thanks for the
vote of confidence!

By: modernmami

modernmami — Tue, 30 Nov 2010 15:45:00 +0000

I was honestly joking about waiting until after breakfast. Of course, you
can’t control when your child has a thought and inquires, requiring you to
drop everything and deal with the situation in the moment – otherwise you
risk losing a great teaching/parenting opportunity. It would be nice,
though, if they could wait. You know, my answers may just be better. LOL

By: Lucilla Feliciano

Lucilla Feliciano — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 17:29:00 +0000

Our mom and daughter conversations used to happen when mom was bathing. It was private and the other family members couldn’t hear what the topic of conversation. I remember my mother always saying, “Can’t I take a shower in peace?” after we would finish our conversations. It is never too young to have these conversations. My dad who is traditional in his thinking, doesn’t agree that my sisters and I share lots of information with my nephews at any given moment. I would say any moment is a teaching moment even if it is before breakfast.

By: Latinaish

Latinaish — Mon, 29 Nov 2010 13:42:00 +0000

Wow – you handled this well. It’s probably cliche at this point for a mother of boys to say “I’m glad I have boys” when this type of discussion comes up, but it’s so true. Raising a girl seems infinitely more complex. I would want to raise her to be confident and well-adjusted, but to enjoy childhood first – and in today’s culture, that is no easy feat. (Of course, I’m trying to do my part by raising young men who respect women, but I think I have the easier task here.)

I don’t remember ever having an interest in wearing a bra. In fact, when my mother made me start wearing a training bra, I cried. I hated it and she constantly had to tell me to go put it on. I felt humiliated.

I was a tomboy though, and I imagine it’s more difficult to raise a little girl who prefers to be more feminine since she will be much more keen on growing up too quickly and being allowed to wear things like bras, makeup, high heels, etc.

Anyway, good job, Melanie. Sounds like you have it under control for now!