Harvest Festivals, Halloween Parades, Pumpkin Patch Field Trips, Thanksgiving Feasts, Christmas Plays, Fall Break and Winter Break…if you’ve got school-aged children in school then the holiday season can be a time of both joy and stress!  Managing your child’s hectic schedule during the fall and winter months can be a huge challenge for working parents. Depending on your work situation, there are multiple strategies that you can take that will allow you to keep your job while sharing your little one’s precious moments:

The “Tag Team” Approach

If you live in a two-parent household, you and your partner can figure out a way to share the special-event appearances.  Perhaps you can alternate dates, or maybe one of you has flexibility during the day and becomes the “Field-Trip Parent” while the other commits to evening activities.  Spreading the love this way will ease the pressure of one parent or the other repeatedly needing to take time off of work.  The obvious bonus to this approach, of course, is that your children will get the benefit of both parents (or even Grandma) actively participating in their events.

The “Quality Not Quantity” Approach

You can’t possibly make every single event without losing brownie points at work or running yourself ragged. So, you can decide to choose a handful of events that you can commit to and make it to those. This works well in helping you maintain your sanity, keeping your boss (mostly) happy, but can also bring on the Mommy Guilt in heavy doses. Though your physical presence may be less, you can make sure that it counts by going the extra mile to volunteer during the events you attend, whether it be working the register at Turkey Bingo Night (been there) or taking the photos for the Costume Parade.

The “Make It Work” Approach

If you feel comfortable talking to your boss about alternative work arrangements, this method could provide a perfect solution to a difficult problem. On days when you’re on pie duty for the Holiday Party, plan to work from home; that way you can prepare your dish at home before heading out to the event (instead of the mad dash to the grocery store before zooming into the school parking lot). Also, chances are the commute to your child’s school will be easier if they attend school close to where you live, allowing you to miss less of the workday. You could also try a compressed work week and work extra hours Monday through Thursday so that you can take Friday off to help set-up for the Kwanzaa Play.

No matter what approach you choose (and it might be a combination!), the key is to be flexible, do what works best for you and your family, and most of all, experience as many of these special moments as you can.

How do you balance your children’s many school activities during the holiday season?

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Continuing the conversation about nurturing and attentive fathers, today we’re going to celebrate those special men in our lives. Happy Father’s Day to my own baby-daddy and to all the wonderful, attentive, supportive, and all-around great fathers out there!

I’ll let some other women gush about their special men. Enjoy.

I can’t say I purposely chose a good father for my children. I was 22 when I married, 23 when my first daughter was born. My girls are now 4 and 9 months old and I can confidently say that they have lucked out in the father department. My husband Sasha is hands on. Every morning he wakes up with both of them to let me sleep in until the last possible minute. From the comfort of my warm bed I hear them playing, eating breakfast, I hear him doing his best to make my fashion specific preschooler happy with the outfit choices he picks out, I hear him soothe my pre-walker when she falls. These sounds are like music to me. My girls have their own special relationship with their dad and that brings me joy. When he reads my oldest daughter her bedtime stories and falls asleep beside her in her pink plastic monstrosity of a bed, I often just let them be and snap a photo for my memory bank. It’ll be years before they realize how blessed they are to have a dad that loves them enough to be there for them and smother them with attention but I know one day they will. Happy Father’s Day, Sasha!

~Bunmi Zalob, The Women of Chestnut Street

My husband is one of the best dads in the world. He is in charge of the sleep routine of our two active boys and reads, prays, and teaches them something new every night. He likes to be sure our two angels go to bed knowing how loved they are. I love to see them playing together – it’s like I have 3 kids instead of 2! I’m so proud of him; every day I think about how blessed I am to have such a loving, supporting husband and amazingly involved daddy.

~Silvia, Mama Latina Tips

As far as fathers go, I didn’t grow up with a great one. My father believed that by providing food and shelter he was fulfilling his obligations. Culturally, we were told that the love and emotional support and affection came from the mother, not the father. The father wasn’t the one that ran to you when you were hurt or needed help with homework, or cared for you when you were sick or crying.

Imagine my surprise every single day, as I watch my husband Travis in his role as father. He is a provider, as my father was, but he is also incredibly nurturing and affectionate. From day one, he has been completely hands on and involved. He is gentle, caring, patient, and loving. When I find that I can’t do any more because I am tired or frustrated, or both, he takes over. We talk a lot about the love of a mother for her child, but I have to say, the love my husband has for his children, all three of them, is something I am often both enviable and proud of.

If there has ever been a true example of what a man is, it is my husband with his children. He is our shelter, our rock, our comforter, our joy. We look up to him for so much and he never falters.

My children are truly lucky to have him as a Dad.

~Carol Cain, The Adventures of a NY City Mama

Let’s hear some more great stories! Share with us all about the wonderful father of your children.

“Working fathers are struggling to juggle the competing demands of family and career, according to a report that shows that they are just as uneasy with their work-life balance as mothers.“

No surprise there. But, perhaps this isn’t obvious to everyone else.

The above quote is from the UK-based article titled Working fathers want more time with their children too. The article outlines some key points from the Fathers, Family and Work report by the Equality and Human Rights Commission (EHRC). A few interesting points in the article:

• 42% of fathers felt they were not able to spend enough time with their children
• About two in five men fear that asking for flexible working arrangements would result in their commitment to their job being questioned.
• “…employers think of women as a potential burden because they worry they will want flexible conditions. It will be helpful for women…once men are also seen as likely to demand flexible working.”

I guess it’s good for formal research to be completed and a report published on what I feel is something most men and women probably already knew. I know that my husband struggles with being a working dad just as much as I do with being a working mom. Of course he wants to spend more time with baby girl. And of course he has a hard time with balancing it all. He often works with me on planning our evening schedules and household calendar to try to manage all aspects of our daily lives.

Is this news to you or does this just confirm what you already knew? Let me know in the comments what you think of the article, the report, or just working dads in general.