Wow. A lot has been going on the past three weeks! Life has been hectic, to say the least; it’s been crazy, busy, and challenging…but, not bad.

It all started with a minor family emergency that led to me staying overnight at my parents’ house to care for my father, who as you may know has dementia. My children and I stayed with him two nights and learned the ins-and-outs of caring for someone with dementia full-time, something my mother does daily. After the initial two nights, the situation changed from staying overnight to going to their house every day to help both of them.

The challenge? My everyday routine of working with two kids at home had to be adjusted to working with two kids at my parents’ house and helping my parents with everyday tasks. Did you get all that?

As I said, it’s been crazy. But, not impossible. Somehow we’ve managed and three weeks later, I can say that I believe I’ve managed to keep up with the most important tasks of work, spend time with the kids, help my parents, and even have a little family fun. While I know there are areas that need improvement and tasks I’d like to do, but haven’t been able to complete, overall I feel we’re getting through this rough patch. So, what has helped?

5 Musts for Dealing with Unexpected Curve Balls in Life

1. Support
   My husband, bless his heart, has been very understanding, supportive, and flexible. He has helped a lot by taking care of things at our own house, and picking up the kids when I’ve had to stay later at my parents’, etc. Just knowing he understands the situation has been helpful enough.
2. Flexibility
   Going with the flow or rolling with the punches – however you want to say it, the point is to be flexible. Regardless of how much planning you do to try to keep you on-task, something may throw your plan out the window. This is important for the kids too, who all too often have had to just go along with what the day threw at us. I kept reminding my daughter that the important part was we were all together, and that somehow we’d make it work.
3. Say no
   I’ve had to say no to some things – events, varying requests, and the like. It’s impossible to be everywhere all the time and do everything. Saying no to extras allowed me to stay on task.
4. Focus on the ‘musts’
   Along with saying no, I’ve tried to focus on the ‘musts’ and put aside the less important tasks. For my work, this meant focusing on meeting deadlines and paid work, and spending less time on social media interaction and promotion. Though both important, I had to really consider if it was time well spent.
5. Humor
   Above all, being able to laugh and keep a good attitude about things has allowed us to stay sane. Seeing the humor in a situation always helps. This also helped show my kids that we can have fun regardless of where we are or how many challenges we’re dealing with.

How do you normally deal with life’s curve balls?

Photo: John Morgan/Flickr

Three weeks of travel can certainly throw you for a loop. One one hand, I was able to attend two conferences and attend a brand event, so business-wise, they were good trips. On the other hand, I’m internally off-balance after traveling three weeks in a row.

Good and bad. There were plenty of good things about these trips and I don’t regret for a second going on any of them. But, as is true with much in life, with the good comes the bad.

The Good

• I was very lucky to have been able to take my family along for both conferences. Though I was mostly attending the conferences, I did get to see them in the mornings and nights. This helped ease the “miss you” moments for both the kids and myself.
• I was able to meet new people, have great conversations, and learn from all three trips.
• I had time to reflect on several things and take advantage of some quiet time to be able to just think.
• I was able to learn more about this brand and find ways we can possibly work together in the future.
• I came home from the most recent trip feeling more calm and full of ideas, rather than feeling just tired. I’m still tired, but the feeling was lessened.

The Bad

• My routine was thrown off and is still off.
• I’m still catching up on work.
• My family missed me, and I missed them.
• My daughter, in particular, was affected by the most recent trip and shed some tears in class because she missed me.
• My head is spinning a bit from being in many places within such a short time, but in a good kind of way.

None of this is extreme or unmanageable. My girl’s classroom situation really affected me the day I received notice from her teacher. But, after talking with her about it and thinking it through, I realized that at least she was able to express her thoughts. I explained to her that it’s absolutely normal to feel that way and that I too missed her. She also realizes these trips are part of my work and describes them as such. I feel it’s good for her to see this side of me in addition to the other roles she sees me play at home.

There are months where I go without any travel, so in the end, all things even out. How do you balance out the good and the bad of business travel?

Photo: Highways Agency/Flickr

Today, I want to share a quote I read not too long ago that I think is worth learning, studying, and remembering.

Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends, and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls—family, health, friends, integrity—are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life. – The Secret to Attaining Work-Life Balance

Feel free to discuss your thoughts on this passage in the comments below.  I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Photo: Lee Jordan

“I guess some weeks have to be bad.”

Those were the words my husband said this morning in response to me saying, “Oh, and last week was so good too!” I said that because yesterday I wasn’t feeling very well, then last night we had a really rough night with baby boy, and we’re exhausted. This is a dangerous combination that’s pretty much going to guarantee today will be hard to get through. I really needed a decent night’s sleep to get over how I was feeling yesterday so as to not repeat the cycle.

Quite the opposite, last week was good both personally and for my family. I was productive in work, we maintained our house’s condition, spent some nice family time together, and had a good week overall. I felt centered with my work-life balance. One day into this week, and we’re not off to a similar start.

My husband’s words got me thinking that the universe has a way of balancing itself. Just as it is said that for every good, there is a bad, perhaps we need to undergo imbalance to acknowledge when we do have balance in our lives. In order to appreciate life balance, we need to get through those days, or even weeks that aren’t so smooth. I suppose as long as you don’t let it consume you and learn to bounce back, it’s fine. We need to learn from those off days and be flexible. It’s apparent to me, yet again, that work life balance is a fluid and ever-changing concept.

Today I will try to have a better day despite my words and attitude early this morning. If I still don’t feel it’s a balanced day, I will take the time to think about what went right and be thankful for that. Then, I’ll try again tomorrow.

I’m learning that balance requires an ongoing effort.

How do you get past those days or weeks where your work-life balance is thrown off?

Photo by Raphaël Labbé

Yesterday was one of those days I wish I could repeat – everything flowed, things got done, balance was had. It’s amazing how one day going smoothly can lift your spirits and motivate you to make it happen again.

Because I had such a great day, I feel like I need to record it. Sometimes you have to sit back and remind yourself of all that went good – little or big. Though this is simple in the grand scheme of things, having a day where work, family, and personal time were in-line is definitely something to celebrate.

We are often striving to create work-life balance, and I talk about it quite often, so I absolutely want to share with you the specifics of how my day went. I hope that by doing so, you will see a glimpse of your own day or find some ideas for small changes you can make in your routine. With that, I share my perfectly balanced day and what I hope will become a regular daily routine for achieving work-life balance in my life.

Personal Daily Routine for Work-Life Balance

6 am: Woke up with hugs from baby boy and baby girl. After a bit of snuggling, dragged myself out of bed and began the morning routine of getting dressed and making sure baby girl got ready for school.

7:30 am: Breakfast time for both kids before heading out the door.

8-8:30 am: Dropped baby girl off at school.

8:30-9 am: Baby boy fell asleep on the ride back home, so waited in driveway for him to take a short nap while reading emails and checking in on Twitter and Facebook on my phone. I also found photo to use in blog post.

9:15-9:45 am: Took out some frozen already-cooked turkey to thaw for dinner. Then, while baby boy sat in his high chair with a snack, did my morning workout to Just Dance 3.

9:45-10:30 am: Ate breakfast, hung out with baby boy, and worked on blog post draft.

10:30-10:45 am: Phone call with client.

10:45-11:30 am: Finished and published blog post. Proceeded to work on marketing it via Facebook, Twitter, and StumbleUpon. Also, posted updates to various social media platforms and groups.

11:30 am – 12 pm: Played with baby boy and continued miscellaneous work on email and social media monitoring.

12 noon: Lunch for baby boy and myself.

12:30-2:30 pm: Continued work in-between playing with baby boy. When he played quietly on the floor, I’d check email or read articles, blog posts, etc. We went back and forth during this time quite a bit.

2:30-3 pm: Picked up baby girl from school

3-4:30 pm: Baby boy fell asleep on the ride home, so baby girl and I took this opportunity to have a tea party and afternoon snack. While she set up the tea party and changed into a princess outfit, I began cooking a turkey soup for dinner. I had enough time to shred the turkey, add all other ingredients and set the pot to simmer, plus sit down with baby girl for a princess tea party and snack before baby boy woke up.

4:30-5 pm: After a quick snack for baby boy, he and his big sister played together and watched TV alone. I ran upstairs to back up some files on our main computer and freshen myself up for the evening.

5-6 pm: Hung out with the kids, fed baby boy dinner, and picked up clutter in the living room. Baby boy got a little fussy during this time too.

6-7:30 pm: After my husband came home, we sat down for dinner, along with baby girl. Afterwards, the kids hung out with daddy and I cleaned up the kitchen.

7:30-8 pm: Bath/shower time for all.

8-8:40 pm: The husband read baby girl her bedtime story and tucked her in while I helped baby boy relax and fall asleep. Some nights baby boy falls asleep quickly, but with the afternoon nap he had, it took a while for him to calm down.

8:45-11 pm: With the kids in bed, the husband and I were finally able to hang out, talk about our days, and watch a little TV before heading to bed ourselves.

The reason this day worked out so great for me is that I felt accomplished. I was able to work on various areas of my life – not just work or just family. I was productive, got work done, spent time with the family, and even took time for myself.

Of course, not every day will work out so great. I know there will be days where baby boy won’t take two naps or will need more attention due to fussiness. There will be days when I’ll need to run errands and I won’t be able to get as much work done. That’s fine. We have to be flexible, right? The important thing is to remember days like these where all did go well and try to replicate them by following a routine as much as possible.

Why don’t you take some time to write out your daily schedule and reflect on what works and what you can improve? Where can you make some changes to your routine to ease the fluidity of the day?

Other articles you may like:

• Sample Daily Routine for Work at Home Mom
• 7 Ways to Find ‘Me Time’

Photos by Vicente Villamón, Andreanna Moya, Robin, and Erica Firment

At this very moment, I’m making my way to San Diego for the BlogHer conference happening this week. I’m looking forward to connecting with fellow bloggers, brands, and PR representatives I’ve collaborated with or have yet to meet. As is the norm for BlogHer, the agenda is packed tight, with multiple events happening each night. Of course, there are also conference sessions and meetings to attend during the day. It’s going to be a busy three days!

While I’m away learning more about the business of blogging, you can catch up on previously featured posts. I’ve highlighted some favorite posts in various topics below. And, hey, if you’re attending BlogHer as well, make sure to say hi if you see me!

Parenting Stories

• Raising Beautiful Girls: Conversations of Body Image
• Marketing to Kids as a Parenting Tool
• Raising Multicultural Children and Providing Positive Messages

Work-Life Balance Tips

• 7 Tips for Finding ‘Me’ Time
• How Do You Define Balance?
• 5 Resources with Tips for Finding or Improving your Work-Life Balance

Latino and Puerto Rican Culture

• Latino Terms of Endearment
• The Importance of Keeping Cultural Traditions Alive
• My Quinceañero – Reminiscing on a Latino Tradition

Puerto Rican Recipes

• Recipe for Puerto Rican Carne Guisada
• How to Make Puerto Rican Arroz con Gandules in a Rice Cooker {Rice with Pigeon Peas}
• Bistec Encebollado Recipe {Puerto Rican Cubed Steak}

WAHM Resources

• Sample Daily Routine for Working from Home
• 5 Tips for Working from Home for the WAHM
• 10 Places to Find Work at Home and Freelance Jobs

Those who know me well, say that I always seem to be on the run. But I know I’m not the only one. Moms everywhere seem to be scrambling for time and we usually manage to juggle (sometimes, rather successfully) one too many balls in the air.

A glimpse of what we juggle every given day: Carpools, supermarket shopping, school activities, meals for the household, school supplies, our kids social lives, after-school activities, managing the home, setting time aside for our spouses… the list could go and on. And this is EXCLUDING any professional obligations you may have.

The important issue that we tend to forget about is not only the juggling, but the balancing. It’s very easy to let one aspect of your life take over the others. And with women, that usually means forgetting to take care of ourselves.

Don’t you forget about me…

Remember that Simple Minds song? OK, now that you know how old I am, I just want to share some simple tips to not lose yourself while juggling everything else during the adventures of motherhood.

• Don’t feel guilty about doing something for yourself. Nobody else will do it for you.  And look at it this way: it will allow you to release tension. A more relaxed mom, is a happier mom. A happier mom, is a better mom.
• Take care of yourself. Yes, that means taking your vitamins, getting enough rest, eating well.
• Treat your “me” time as an appointment. Sounds too planned? Well, the truth is, IT WORKS.
• Organization is key. Arrange with your spouse or partner or a trusted friend to watch over the little ones for a specific amount of time each week to give you a breather.
• Choose something you’d like to do, not something you need to do: a manicure, coffee with friends, reading a book, even shopping.

When work overwhelms you

Regardless of where you work at, the juggling act seems to throw in more and more balls in the air and if you really pause to think, it can overwhelm you. In these cases, learn to prioritize what’s urgent from what’s not. If everything’s urgent, then something’s really wrong, because something has to be most important in your to do list.

In this era of hyperconnectivity, it can be hard to set limits and boundaries. But just like you need them when raising your kids, you need them to keep your sanity while working and trying to balance your life a bit better. And believe it or not, you are the person that needs to respect those boundaries the most.

For some, it means no smart phones even near the kitchen or dinner table. For others, not taking calls or answering emails in the evening. And I’m assuming you already know that texting and driving don’t mix well. You need to find what works for you. Then, stick to your resolutions.

When family responsibilities drain you

Sometimes it’s the chores and everyday routines that sap out your energy, Again, a little organization and planning goes a long way.

• Decide what really has to be done and don’t get sucked into the non essential stuff.
• Make a schedule for your kids. For younger ones, take pictures of the daily tasks they must do (for example: eat breakfast, brush their teeth, take a bath, got to bed) and decorate together a poster they can look at. For older kids, make a schedule on the computer and print it out for them.
• Buy gifts for birthday parties in advance. If you are always pressed for time, use gift bags and tissue paper instead of wrapping every gift individually. You can even buy in bulk online and save.
• Do a master shopping list on your computer, print several and have them in the kitchen. Check off items as soon as you are running low and that way you’ll avoid multiple trips to the supermarket during the same week.
• Learn to say no. Sometimes that means scheduling less after-school activities, organizing less play dates or not hosting all the family dinners.
• Ask for help. Wonder Woman only exists in a comic book.

Personally, I dream about having my groceries delivered, but have to accept the reality that none of the supermarkets close to my home offer that service. So, I shop once a week and go at odd times when not so many people do their grocery shopping. Sometimes that means right after dropping the kids off for school, other times it’s late in the evening while my husband takes over parenting duties.

You’re in this for the long haul

The juggling act of motherhood is not a one hit wonder. You’re in this adventure for the long haul, and will have better days and not so great days.  Sometimes one of the balls will fall to the floor, or you might get hit on the head by a curve ball. It’s not the end of the world, and those around you will follow your lead on how to react.

So next time something doesn’t work out the way you had planned, try laughing or smiling instead of getting angry or even wanting to cry. A sense of humor works wonders and aside from making you feel a bit better, comic relief is underrated when dealing with your children. So then, aside from juggler extraordinaire, you will tune into the comedian inside of you. After all, there are moments in life that are so utterly absurd, all you can do is laugh if you want to find the strength to keep on going!

Harvest Festivals, Halloween Parades, Pumpkin Patch Field Trips, Thanksgiving Feasts, Christmas Plays, Fall Break and Winter Break…if you’ve got school-aged children in school then the holiday season can be a time of both joy and stress!  Managing your child’s hectic schedule during the fall and winter months can be a huge challenge for working parents. Depending on your work situation, there are multiple strategies that you can take that will allow you to keep your job while sharing your little one’s precious moments:

The “Tag Team” Approach

If you live in a two-parent household, you and your partner can figure out a way to share the special-event appearances.  Perhaps you can alternate dates, or maybe one of you has flexibility during the day and becomes the “Field-Trip Parent” while the other commits to evening activities.  Spreading the love this way will ease the pressure of one parent or the other repeatedly needing to take time off of work.  The obvious bonus to this approach, of course, is that your children will get the benefit of both parents (or even Grandma) actively participating in their events.

The “Quality Not Quantity” Approach

You can’t possibly make every single event without losing brownie points at work or running yourself ragged. So, you can decide to choose a handful of events that you can commit to and make it to those. This works well in helping you maintain your sanity, keeping your boss (mostly) happy, but can also bring on the Mommy Guilt in heavy doses. Though your physical presence may be less, you can make sure that it counts by going the extra mile to volunteer during the events you attend, whether it be working the register at Turkey Bingo Night (been there) or taking the photos for the Costume Parade.

The “Make It Work” Approach

If you feel comfortable talking to your boss about alternative work arrangements, this method could provide a perfect solution to a difficult problem. On days when you’re on pie duty for the Holiday Party, plan to work from home; that way you can prepare your dish at home before heading out to the event (instead of the mad dash to the grocery store before zooming into the school parking lot). Also, chances are the commute to your child’s school will be easier if they attend school close to where you live, allowing you to miss less of the workday. You could also try a compressed work week and work extra hours Monday through Thursday so that you can take Friday off to help set-up for the Kwanzaa Play.

No matter what approach you choose (and it might be a combination!), the key is to be flexible, do what works best for you and your family, and most of all, experience as many of these special moments as you can.

How do you balance your children’s many school activities during the holiday season?

Just when I started feeling like I had a bit of a handle on this work-life balance thing, I will be needing to redefine, readjust, and re-prioritize, well everything, in the coming weeks. Our second child will soon be here and come early December, the balance in our house will be thrown out the door. At least, until we’re able to come up with a new routine and schedule for the various aspects of our lives.

I am fully aware that life will be changing in many ways now that our family of three will be a family of four. But, I don’t think that anything can truly prepare you until you’re in the midst of it and able to assess just what adjustments need to be made. It’s much like when you have the first baby – people can tell you their experiences, advice, and tips for how your life will change, but you don’t really know until that baby is in your house.

However, with a business to run, two blogs, and oh yeah, a family and house to manage, I can’t help but try to prepare myself ahead of time. If anything, it at least gives me some peace of mind to know that I tried. That counts, right?

My plan?

• Business: I am doing as much as I can now to line up plans so that I am in a good spot for taking a few weeks off. Once I’m past the initial period of adjustment, I hope to come back to pick up right where I left off with minimal catch-up needed.
• Blogs: I’m trying my best to write extra posts that I can schedule for the coming months. I am also seeking contributors that I can highlight with guest posts, in order to keep content running while I’m on maternity leave. (Email me if you’re interested in contributing with a guest post, or two, or three.) And, of course, I’m trusting that all of you will fully understand and stick with me if there’s a slow down in posts during that time.
• Family: We have already been preparing our baby girl with several talks and mentions of a) how she can help when her baby brother arrives and b) that there may be times we will not be able to rush to cater to her need at that moment. I know that family members will also be around to help – I’m lucky to live near my mom. So, between my husband, myself, and the help of family, I am confident that we’ll be able to adjust to the new dynamics with minor adjustments.
• House: Since our baby boy will be here very very soon, we are in what we call “crunch time mode.” My husband has been working hard to get the house clean, rearranging and reorganizing certain areas, since my very pregnant self is of no use these days and can barely bend at this point. I also intend to work out a menu plan with my husband, full of easy meals he can cook if need be and meals that can serve for two or three dinners (perhaps with some re-purposing).

I know that all of this planning doesn’t mean that our life after the baby is born will undergo a smooth, worry-free, and uncomplicated transition. I realize there will be unexpected circumstances and changes. Still, I hope that some of this planning will ease some of the transitions and allow us to deal with the unexpected without needing to worry about those aspects of our lives that we can, in fact, control at this moment.

Do you have any tips to share for transitioning and welcoming a second child into the family?

Plenty of people find it difficult to get some time alone. We’re all busy with work, our home life, family, activities, and just life in general. It can be hard to find some time for yourself. But, more and more, I see that women and moms in particular, complain the most about getting some time for themselves – some ‘me’ time.

It seems that men either don’t require ‘me’ time as much as women do or they just don’t admit it. At any rate, it makes sense that parents are often the ones asking how they can get a little time alone and away from the everyday.

I thought about some of the ways that I manage to keep my sanity and balance out my life a little bit. Ok, well, maybe not my life, but my head at least.

7 Tips for Finding ‘Me’ Time

1. Take a break to goof around on the Internet. Whether it be a quick tour of your favorite social media networks or visiting your preferred blogs to read or just simply doing a bit of online shopping, you will be amazed how a few minutes online can easily give your brain a much needed break from reality.
2. Pretend you have to use the bathroom. I know this sounds crazy. Believe me, I do. However, when you’ve got too much going on and it seems like it’ll be a while before you can break from it, this may be a temporary solution. Just lock the bathroom door and give yourself 10 minutes of quiet. If you have a magazine rack in your bathroom or leave a book in there, you can even catch up on some of that reading you’ve been meaning to do. And sweetie…if you’re reading this…I never do this. Ever.
3. Take a shower. Or bath. Make it a LONG one. Don’t rush your shower. Take a few extra minutes to just let the warm water hit your back. Or spend a bit more time working the shampoo into your hair. If you can take a nice relaxing bubble bath, then even better!
4. Enforce bedtime. Make sure that your kids stick to their bedtime. I can’t tell you how much I love the 2-3 hours each night after my baby girl goes to sleep. Most of the time, I end up spending this time either working or watching some TV with my husband, but there’s times that I get those hours all to myself if I plan in advance.
5. Meditate. Pray. Reflect. Whatever you call it and however you do it, taking some time to think about things can do wonders for clearing your head of all the noise. You can easily do this while driving, cooking, or cleaning.
6. Exercise. Go for a 20 minute walk. Do a quick yoga routine. Or dance along to some music.
7. Go grocery shopping. It’s something that needs to be done anyway, isn’t it? Leave everyone else at home and go by yourself. You may even get the shopping done faster than normal (but not TOO fast, ok?).

These tips may not be glamorous. They may not include a night out on the town with your girls. But, they’re realistic and can offer some simple yet effective ways for you to feel like you’re getting a little ‘me’ time in for yourself. Also? I hope it’s obvious that if you have kids, you’ll clearly need to have someone supervising them when you’re getting your ‘me’ time. Especially if you’re locking yourself in the bathroom.

How do you find some time for yourself? What do you normally do with your ‘me’ time?