Source: stu_spivack/Flickr

Growing up, Christmas was always a fun time for me. I have great memories of Navidad in Puerto Rico, especially. I remember the vibrant music, fun spirit everyone seemed to be in, and the food. Oh, the food! The traditional Puerto Rican Nochebuena (Christmas Eve) dinner is one that I still love to this day.

In fact, one of the things I most remember is making pasteles during the weeks leading up to Christmas. Pasteles are a Puerto Rican dish made with green bananas and filled with pork, potatoes, and a few other ingredients that everyone customizes to their liking. They are typically served as part of the Nochebuena dinner and take all day to make. Because of that, my parents would set aside an entire weekend for making pasteles and each member of our family had their own task in the process. From peeling and grating the bananas, to cooking the filling, and finally assembling and tying the pasteles, each person’s task was instrumental.

I remember my father would put the radio on and we’d listen to traditional aguinaldos (Puerto Rican Christmas folk music) as we cooked and made pasteles. I grew to love this accidental tradition and looked forward to it each year. As I got older, I began to ask what day was going to be pasteles day so I could be sure to know ahead of time.

As I look at my own family now, I’m not sure that we’ve yet created a holiday tradition of our own. We put up a Christmas tree and other Christmas decorations. We wait until Christmas Eve to put the gifts under the tree and open them up bright and early on Christmas morning before even eating breakfast. But, I feel we have yet to find our way in traditions – formal ones anyway.

Photo © modernmami

One thing we do have is that we have a couple of Christmas countdown “calendars” that our baby girl enjoys updating each day to count down the days until Christmas. This year a new one has been added to our decorations that is super fun. Thanks to Hallmark, we now have a Christmas countdown radio ornament, their North Pole Countdown Keepsake Ornament, which provides special messages each day from the North Pole. My girl is definitely enjoying the fun messages each day from NOLE 1225 (the radio station’s name)!

Something else that has happened just about every year and that has jokingly become a tradition between my husband and I, is that we end up wrapping our children’s gifts late at night on Christmas Eve. For some reason, this always gets left until the last minute and we somehow find ourselves staying up late on Christmas Eve wrapping their gifts. It’s kind of become our own tradition, I suppose.

What holiday traditions do you remember from your childhood? What new traditions do you celebrate with your family?

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

“Practice makes perfect.“

We all know the saying. We heard it growing up and we’ve probably said it to our own children. The intention is good: don’t give up and keep practicing, you’ll eventually get it or be better. But, are we inadvertently sending our kids a message that perfection is desired?

My baby girl has recently been having a hard time coming to terms with mistakes she makes. She wants so badly to do things the right way (on the first try ideally) that she gets frustrated if a mistake is made or she doesn’t quite get it on that first try. We’re working on it and she’s slowly, but surely coming to terms with the fact that no one is perfect or born knowing everything.

It’s hard teaching a child to not be perfect. It’s hard explaining that it really is ok to make mistakes and that it can even be a good thing at times. We’ve talked and talked about how many mistakes her father and I have made in the past. We’ve shown her examples in history of mistakes leading to greater things and inventions. We even model and point out when we currently make mistakes and show her what we do to try to fix them. Yet, she still holds on to a bit of the idea that she would like for it to be perfect. Sometimes, it seems it even stops her from trying, for fear of “failing” in her mind.

I suppose when you’re six years old, it’s difficult to balance the desire to do your best and simultaneously accept the fact that your best may not be perfect. It’s a process, learning not to be perfect. A process that requires us to put our own flaws out on display in order to show her that even those she looks to for answers are nowhere near perfect.

These days, instead of saying, “practice makes perfect,” we say, “practice makes better.” It’s our new mantra.

How do you help your kids overcome the fear of failure and accept that mistakes are ok, or even good?

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Image © ModernMami.com

Last year my daughter began her first year of formal schooling as a Kindergartner at a local public school. I say formal schooling because she had been learning at home long before that. Ever since she was a baby (actually even while in the womb), my husband and I had been reading to her. Once she learned the alphabet, we expanded and began to teach her how to read.

We’ve never been ones to think that school will take care of our children’s education. We know there is plenty of information that is not included in a school curriculum that will require us to supplement their education at home with life and cultural experiences, extracurricular activities, and conversations. We are constantly asking questions, creating hypothetical scenarios, and encouraging her to think further and wonder. “Ask questions,” we tell her just about every day.

The same goes for us. We ask questions when we aren’t clear on something they’re doing at school. We ask questions when we meet the teacher at the beginning of the school year. We ask questions at any given point during the school year to be sure we know and understand what our daughter is working on in the classroom and how she’s doing. We want to know how we can help her be a good student and enjoy her school experience.

Sadly, there are many parents who don’t realize they can be their child’s advocate. They don’t believe they can do much to change a particular situation. I realized this as I spoke to a parent at my daughter’s school last year regarding an issue in the classroom. I simply asked, “What do you think about what’s going on?” The answer was a shrug of the shoulders with “Well, what can we do, right?” I thought about the many things we could indeed do and that some of us were already in the process of doing at that point. What worried me more was that our conversation was in Spanish and I wondered if that played a factor into the situation. Was a cultural difference affecting what these parents felt they could do or say?

As parents, I think we can’t sit back and trust that all will go well with our children’s education. We need to be involved and be proactive. If we sense something is wrong, we should ask questions – of our children and their teachers. Likewise, we can show an interest in our child’s education by keeping an open line of communication with our children’s teacher(s). If we show our children’s teachers that we’re truly interested in working together for the benefit of our children, then nothing bad can come of it.

To promote being active in our children’s education and empower parents, Univision began the Es el Momento (This is the Moment) initiative, which includes special programming, videos, and resources on the TV network and their online platforms. To learn more and find educational resources (mostly in Spanish), visit Es el Momento or connect with them on Facebook.

Disclosure: This is a sponsored post as part of a campaign to raise awareness about the Es el Momento initiative. As always, all stories and views are my own.

Photo: www.audio-luci-store.it/Flickr

We’ve talked about some of the top mobile and online safety concerns of parents and explored how to talk with kids about mobile and online safety. In this post, we’ll take a look at some interesting stats and information concerning kids and the use of mobile phones. You may find yourself surprised by some of the information!

AT&T conducted a survey of 1,000 parents and 500 children between the ages of 8–17. Through that survey, they learned about mobile phone use for children and how parents and children communicate regarding mobile safety. Here are a few of the findings I found interesting:

• 31% of children ages 8-11 already have a cell phone
• The average age kids receive their first mobile phone is 12
• 90% of kids think it’s OK for parents to set rules on mobile phone use
• 38% of kids say their parents have not talked to them about mobile safety
• 53% of kids report that they have ridden with someone who was texting and driving

I was surprised to learn that so many children already have a cell phone at such young ages. But, at the same time, with safety being a top concern for parents (myself included), I can understand why parents of young children would provide them with a phone. Times are not how they used to be and I would rather provide my children with a way to get in touch with me in case of emergency than trust someone will be around to help them at the moment. I imagine many parents feel the same way.

Of course, even more surprising was that so many kids have been in a car where the driver was texting and driving. I admit that I’ve been guilty of this myself, but I normally do so at a red light, not while actively driving. However, I think I’m going to avoid even that from now on because I need to set a better example for my kids.

Were you surprised by any of the survey result findings?

Disclosure: This post is the final part of a compensated series for the AT&T Mobile Safety program. Check out top mobile and online safety concerns of parents and talking about mobile and online safety with kids for more and the AT&T Mobile Safety page too!

Photo source: Angelo DeSantis/Flickr

After sharing some of the top mobile and online safety concerns of parents, this post will explore how to talk with kids about online safety. When is too early? How much information should we give them? What type of conversations should we be having?

I think it all depends on the age of your child(ren). Your teen may need a lot more information than your preschooler, and the devices they use will be different. For example, my six-year-old daughter doesn’t yet use texting or the Internet. She does however use apps, on our mobile phones and the iPad. For her, it’s much more important that we talk about proper use of apps and avoiding advertising or purchases, rather than discussing texting while driving. That won’t make much sense to her since it’s not relevant for the phase she’s in.

Depending on your child’s age, you may consider discussing any (or all) of these topics:

• Advertising: What is advertising? How can you tell if it’s an advertisement? What should you do (or not do) if you see an advertisement?
• Apps: What type of apps are allowed for your family? Who can purchase apps? What is the spending limit for app purchases?
• Screen time: How much time is allowed for using mobile devices?
• Texting: How much texting will be allowed? What type of messages are safe and unsafe? Driving safety (avoiding texting and driving).
• Safe browsing: Deciphering between legit and good resources vs opinion-based sites. Avoiding scams. What is a predator? What type of information do we never provide online?
• Cyber bullying: Recognizing this as a legit form of bullying. How to avoid feeding online trolls. Ensuring we are not partaking in bullying techniques ourselves.
• Netiquette: Basic net etiquette and manners. What are emoticons? How can they be used to convey emotion online? What are online acronyms and what do they stand for?

Of course, this is just a sample of topics you can discuss when it comes to talking mobile and online safety with your children. There are many more I have failed to list. Inform yourself, ask questions, and be open with your kids. Let them know that if something doesn’t ‘feel’ right, they should ask you about it. Though there are aspects of letting your kids online that may seem scary, it doesn’t have to be. Check out the AT&T Mobile Safety page for more info too!

What other topics would you discuss with your children?

I’ll have one more post to share with you in the coming days regarding the AT&T Mobile Safety School events I hosted. Look for it soon!

Disclosure: This post is part of a compensated campaign for the AT&T Mobile Safety program.

Photo source: Anthony Kelly/Flickr

This past summer, I partnered with AT&T and hosted three local events to facilitate a discussion with parents on online and mobile safety. Through AT&T’s Mobile Safety program, I was able to get together with local parents in our community and gain insight into what concerns them about Internet and mobile safety with their children. I also relayed information provided by AT&T including tips for discussing online safety with your children, navigating mobile apps with even the youngest children, and of course, mobile phones for children.

What I like the most about AT&T’s method is that it is less about restricting online and mobile use for children and more about empowering them with proper information. If you know my husband and I, you know that we don’t shy away from technology in our household and actually embrace it. With proper limits on use and showing them appropriate techniques, we feel technology is not something to fear with our children. Because of that, I appreciated the overall message from AT&T to engage children in conversations about online and mobile safety instead of simply setting restrictions.

The attendees at each of the three Safety School events I hosted had children of varying ages. Many, though, were parents of children eight and under, just like me, so it was easy to relate to their concerns. After speaking with parents at the events, here are five of their top concerns regarding mobile and online safety:

• How can I be sure my child is protected from online and mobile app advertising?
• What are some of the best apps for toddlers and preschoolers?
• How do you find appropriate apps for young children?
• I don’t necessarily want my child to have a phone at such a young age, but for safety reasons, I feel like sending him/her to school with a phone is a good idea so he/she can get in touch with me after school.
• What IS a good age for my child to get his/her first phone?

Do you share some of these concerns? How have you dealt with them?

I’ll be sharing two additional posts with you in the coming days with more information from the AT&T Mobile Safety School events I hosted. Look for them soon!

Disclosure: This post is part of a compensated campaign for the AT&T Mobile Safety program.

Photo source: henriksent/Flickr

“Change is good,” I recently told my six-year-old. “It often means you’re progressing and moving forward.” These days I am finding the need to remind myself of this as I watch my sweet baby girl become less baby and more girl. The change is there, staring me straight in the face and taunting my motherly need to keep her a baby.

It’s odd to have your own words playing back to you, reminding you that her growing up and becoming a little girl as opposed to a preschooler is indeed, a good thing. It means she’s growing as she should, developmentally and physically. It means life is progressing and we have much to be thankful for – a healthy daughter and days full of life.

Still…she’s my baby girl and will always be my baby, no matter how much taller than me she gets. I imagine this is somewhat how my own mami felt as I got older. Of course, it’s only now that I understand.

I sit and watch my daughter and can see how her body is physically changing to prepare for what’s to come in a few years. I see how her personality is solidifying and her beliefs forming. I see the change, little by little, and wonder what change will come next.

Her questions and curiosity show signs of her interests: a little bit of science, math, and the arts. It’s a little scary how close to a perfect mix this is of my husband and I. Will that too change one day? Will she eventually lose her ability to see the small things? Just how much of her will change?

In science, it is said that by merely observing an object, you alter the results of your experiment. I sometimes wonder how much of her I’m changing with each word I say.

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Photo copyright Melanie Edwards & ModernMami.com

“I don’t know how single parents do this!”

I remember the first time I said those words to my husband. It was a few months after our baby girl was born. Life with a baby, I found out, was hard – harder than I ever could have imagined. How in the world do single parents get through the daily logistics of taking care of a baby without the support of another? How do single moms take simple bathroom breaks with no one else around to watch baby? “I admire single moms…and dads,” I tell him every time I have a challenging day with the kids.

Luckily, my husband has been there for our kids (and me) since the very beginning for both our kids. He’s a very nurturing and hands-on father, something that seems to surprise many people. It’s also something I’m extremely grateful for since I know not all fathers are like him. He knows it, as I thank him quite often. His response: “Why are you thanking me? They’re MY kids!”

As supportive as my husband is about many things, and even though we’re both there for our kids, it’s still hard to raise children. It’s amazing how much energy kids take out of you. Even in a household with two parents, like ours, help from others is appreciated. That help comes in many forms.

There’s the childcare center baby girl attended for two years – at first full-time when both my husband and I worked outside the home, then part-time after I began to work from home. There’s also friends and family who have helped us at various times over the years in one way or another. But, the most important member of our village has to be my mom. My kids’ abuela has also been there for us since the beginning, helping me out during my c-section recovery the weeks after giving birth (both times), and continually over the years.

My mom, without a doubt, has been of great help and continues to be. She loves our kids as if they’re her own and is pretty much willing to do anything for them. In turn, my kids have a wonderful relationship with their abuela and I can see that they truly consider her a part of their support system. I’d be remiss if I didn’t mention that my mom took care of our daughter for three and a half years, five days a week, before she started attending the childcare center. Abuela has definitely helped us and has played an important role in our children’s lives.

It’s people like these that need to know they are appreciated. Sometimes a simple card saying so can go a long way. I took some time to browse the personalized cards available on Hallmark.com to find the perfect thank you card for my mom. I started the process, but as with many things in our busy lives, am still working on finishing up her personalized card. I can’t wait for her to get it! She needs to be reminded just how much we appreciate having her as part of our village.

Who’s in your village and plays an important role in your children’s lives? Have you thanked them recently?

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Top photo: pasukaru76/Flickr

Baby boy is starting to say more words these days. They aren’t many, but they sure are cute to hear! He’s been saying dada for a while now, and just recently started saying mama too, though he doesn’t say it very often. He was also saying small words like, wow, uh uh(to say no), and his sister’s name. In the past three months, especially in the last few weeks, he’s progressed to saying more words and even some phrases. Here’s some of what he says:

• No!
• Yeah
• I see you!
• Oh no!
• Uh oh!
• This way
• Bye!
• Hi!

Those words and phrases you can distinctly make out. In the case of no, it’s very, very clear! Isn’t that word always one they learn right away? There are a couple more words that are a little harder to understand, but we know it’s what he’s trying to say.

• Leche (milk) – He also signs this along with trying to say it.
• 1, 2, 3, go! – He doesn’t actually pronounce the numbers, but you can hear he says three one-syllable words before he says the word go, which is clear.
• Thank you – Pretty much every time we hand him something, he responds with a two-syllable phrase that very much sounds like he’s saying thank you!

It’s fun when kids are first learning to talk. I love hearing his little voice developing and seeing how quickly he picks up on things. He learned to say “I see you!” really fast after hearing me say it only a couple of times to him while playing peek-a-boo. Big sister loves hearing him talk too and will be the first one to come running if she thinks he said something new. Her favorite, of course, is hearing him say her name. She just about melts when he does that!

What were some of your babies’ first words?

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Disney Baby. I’ll be joining the Disney Baby blogging team next month, and look forward to sharing these kinds of stories with you over there! Stay tuned for more details!

Photo: Philippe Put/Flickr

Tantrums. We’re so there. Oh, how I wish we could skip this stage of parenting! Can anyone make that happen?

Tantrums are nothing new to us, of course. Being that this is our second child, we know all too well what it’s like to deal with a toddler and tantrums. Even so, it’s hard to actually get through them!

When baby girl was almost 18 months old, the terrible twos hit. And they hit hard. She actually started acting up even before that, but 18 months was probably when it got really bad. Similarly, baby boy has started his tantrums before the 18-month mark. Luckily, though, they’re not as bad as his big sister’s. Let’s hope that doesn’t change.

Back when we dealt with baby girl’s toddler tantrums, most people would provide us with some form of the following advice:

• Ignore it.
• Let her cry.
• Some kids will hit themselves.
• So what if she makes herself throw up, what’s the worst that can happen?

When you’re in the moment, though, it’s very hard to ignore your child banging her head against the wall or crying so hard she vomits. Though baby boy is not doing either of those things – he really just cries and runs around in a circle for a bit – it’s still hard to ignore the crying fit.

The good thing is that we are more prepared this time around and know that if we don’t pay it much mind, he’ll calm down. We also know that he’s truly just frustrated or upset about a situation and cannot communicate that to us. Reminding ourselves of this makes it easier to distract him from the offense or help him calm down faster.

It’s still tough.

One thing we were told back when baby girl’s tantrums got to a very difficult stage, was that we should start formal time-outs. We had already been doing time-outs, but not formally. We weren’t telling her it was a time-out and we also weren’t using a specific chair. Perhaps it’s time to initiate the time-out ritual with baby boy before his tantrums worsen.

Baby girl’s tantrums did eventually get better. We stuck with time-outs and soon enough, we didn’t even need them. I just can’t remember how long it took us to get to that point. I know that baby boy’s tantrum stage will also pass just as hers did. But, I’m already ready for them to be over.

How long did the tantrum stage last for your kids?

Disclosure: This post is sponsored by Disney Baby. I’ll be joining the Disney Baby blogging team next month, and look forward to sharing these kinds of stories with you over there! Stay tuned for more details!

Photo: Chirag Rathod/Flickr