When we decided to have a second child, one of the things we were concerned about (but only slightly) was how our baby girl would handle the transition. Would she be jealous? Would she like having a little brother or sister? How would she act towards the new baby in the house?

As we worked on trying to get pregnant, we talked a lot with her. We’d ask how she would feel about being a big sister, we’d stress how she’d be able to teach her little brother or sister new things, and we made sure she knew that she’d always be our baby girl. After finding out we were pregnant, we waited a few weeks before letting her know the news, and did not share with her until after our first gynecologist appointment. That day, we came home with a sonogram picture of her brother, on which our doctor had so kindly written a special message for her. She still has that sonogram picture framed in her room.

Once our baby boy was born, of course, the initial transition was difficult for all. There were many days spent learning his ways, his needs, and finding our rhythm as a new family of four. While I spent much of that time breastfeeding and napping, it was helpful that my husband was able to spend quality time with our girl, something she most definitely needed. I can remember coming in and out of naps and hearing the two of them playing games or just talking. This was important as so much attention goes to the baby those first few weeks; as a big sister, she needed to know she still mattered.

Something I remember helped us out was involving her in everything. Since they are five years apart, she was already old enough to help with many things. From getting us diapers, wipes, and clothes, to singing lullabies to soothe her little brother, it all helped to let her know her role as the big sister was an important one. To this day, she’s still a big help and loves when we ask her to “watch him” or if she can feed him.

Aside from being a helpful big sister, something we constantly remind her of, we try our best to do individual activities with her whenever possible. It can be simple things like playing a game when he’s napping or her new favorite, giving each other make-overs. The one-on-one time is not only good for her, but for us as well. We also give her small gifts occasionally, just because. She’s really a well-behaved, generous girl, so providing her with small reminders of our appreciation is something we’re glad to do. Just a few days ago, I surprised her with this cute lady bug Hallmark sent us and wrote her a nice note in one of their cards. She loves getting notes, letters, and cards, so it was perfect!

Our baby girl truly deserves all she gets and we couldn’t have asked for a smoother transition from a three-member family to a family of four. It’s actually hard to remember not being a family of four, and I know she feels the same way.

How do you show support for the big siblings in your house?

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Just when I started feeling like I had a bit of a handle on this work-life balance thing, I will be needing to redefine, readjust, and re-prioritize, well everything, in the coming weeks. Our second child will soon be here and come early December, the balance in our house will be thrown out the door. At least, until we’re able to come up with a new routine and schedule for the various aspects of our lives.

I am fully aware that life will be changing in many ways now that our family of three will be a family of four. But, I don’t think that anything can truly prepare you until you’re in the midst of it and able to assess just what adjustments need to be made. It’s much like when you have the first baby – people can tell you their experiences, advice, and tips for how your life will change, but you don’t really know until that baby is in your house.

However, with a business to run, two blogs, and oh yeah, a family and house to manage, I can’t help but try to prepare myself ahead of time. If anything, it at least gives me some peace of mind to know that I tried. That counts, right?

My plan?

• Business: I am doing as much as I can now to line up plans so that I am in a good spot for taking a few weeks off. Once I’m past the initial period of adjustment, I hope to come back to pick up right where I left off with minimal catch-up needed.
• Blogs: I’m trying my best to write extra posts that I can schedule for the coming months. I am also seeking contributors that I can highlight with guest posts, in order to keep content running while I’m on maternity leave. (Email me if you’re interested in contributing with a guest post, or two, or three.) And, of course, I’m trusting that all of you will fully understand and stick with me if there’s a slow down in posts during that time.
• Family: We have already been preparing our baby girl with several talks and mentions of a) how she can help when her baby brother arrives and b) that there may be times we will not be able to rush to cater to her need at that moment. I know that family members will also be around to help – I’m lucky to live near my mom. So, between my husband, myself, and the help of family, I am confident that we’ll be able to adjust to the new dynamics with minor adjustments.
• House: Since our baby boy will be here very very soon, we are in what we call “crunch time mode.” My husband has been working hard to get the house clean, rearranging and reorganizing certain areas, since my very pregnant self is of no use these days and can barely bend at this point. I also intend to work out a menu plan with my husband, full of easy meals he can cook if need be and meals that can serve for two or three dinners (perhaps with some re-purposing).

I know that all of this planning doesn’t mean that our life after the baby is born will undergo a smooth, worry-free, and uncomplicated transition. I realize there will be unexpected circumstances and changes. Still, I hope that some of this planning will ease some of the transitions and allow us to deal with the unexpected without needing to worry about those aspects of our lives that we can, in fact, control at this moment.

Do you have any tips to share for transitioning and welcoming a second child into the family?