We’re 17 days into 2013 and I’m still working on overall plans for self- and home-organization. I’ve been able to organize a few aspects of daily life, but others still need work.

Something I’ve started doing at the end of each week, is reflecting on what worked and what could have been improved upon during the past week. It’s really helped to dissuade those feelings of not having accomplished enough. When I take inventory of what the entire week involved, I quickly notice that things did get done, even if there were parts that could have gone better.

Planned Changes

In 2013, I plan to do a few things differently in an effort to not feel like there’s chaos in every single corner of my life. Some of those changes include:

Getting back to menu planning

I am not sure why I ever stopped creating a weekly menu plan. I know that it made it so much easier to know what to cook each day and have the grocery shopping done in advance.

Following a cleaning schedule

Though it seems unnecessary to have a cleaning schedule, sometimes the housework can go ignored with work, kids, and everyday responsibilities. I know that I personally tend to put off housework in favor of other tasks or for fun with the kids, etc. Because of that, an area that wasn’t in dire need of cleaning, piles up and then becomes a daunting task of catch-up cleaning. Following a cleaning schedule where the housework can be divided up into chunks throughout the week seems to help avoid a huge pile-up.

Using an editorial calendar for blog content

Amazingly, I don’t have a formal editorial calendar for my own sites, though I am used to working with one when freelance writing for other sites. I’d like to create one this year, even if just for a few months at a time, so that I can better plan upcoming content and how to fit in various requests.

Creating a self-care routine

Something else that tends to be pushed aside is caring for myself. As an example, I can easily go a week or more without properly washing my hair (and let’s not even talk about the deep conditioning treatments I should be doing). Now that I’m in my 30s, I think it’s time I have a regular beauty/self-care routine where I take care of things like my skin and hair on a regular basis. I certainly want to avoid future issues as I “get older.”

Exercising

This is always an issue for me, but I really need to get over it and just get myself used to a regular exercise routine. I don’t want to exercise just for losing weight (though I do want to lose some), but more so for my overall health and to show my kids that exercise is important.

What changes have you put into effect for 2013?

Photo: StormKatt/Flickr

Happy New Year my friends! As I look back at 2012, I realize that while it wasn’t bad, it could have been better. But, the past is just that and I am aiming to move forward in 2013. I don’t exactly have resolutions, but I do have goals in mind. I have things I want and need to do this year – for myself, my business, and my family.

Goals for myself include taking better care of myself. Outside of the usual New Year’s goals of eating better and exercise, I also need to take care of my health and am starting the year with various doctor’s appointments to schedule. I also want to create a regular self-care routine so that I don’t go 2 months without a pedicure, or a week without washing my hair. I get caught up in the daily routine and the rush of getting ready with the kids around, that I don’t often take the time to do much beyond the basics.

My inner self needs love too and this year I’d like to read more, learn something new, and just work on growing my knowledge. I feel like my brain is mush much of the time and need to change that.

I have several goals for my business as well, though I’m still figuring out the logistics and steps required to achieve them. But, 2013 needs to be a year of business growth regardless of how I get there.

Working on all these areas of my life will ultimately help my family. In the end, that is my biggest goal for 2013: to be a better mother, wife, daughter, and person. There are just so many pieces that go into completing that goal; I have to take them one at a time.

What is your main goal (or resolution) for 2013?

Photo: Ramos Alejandro/Flickr

“Practice makes perfect.“

We all know the saying. We heard it growing up and we’ve probably said it to our own children. The intention is good: don’t give up and keep practicing, you’ll eventually get it or be better. But, are we inadvertently sending our kids a message that perfection is desired?

My baby girl has recently been having a hard time coming to terms with mistakes she makes. She wants so badly to do things the right way (on the first try ideally) that she gets frustrated if a mistake is made or she doesn’t quite get it on that first try. We’re working on it and she’s slowly, but surely coming to terms with the fact that no one is perfect or born knowing everything.

It’s hard teaching a child to not be perfect. It’s hard explaining that it really is ok to make mistakes and that it can even be a good thing at times. We’ve talked and talked about how many mistakes her father and I have made in the past. We’ve shown her examples in history of mistakes leading to greater things and inventions. We even model and point out when we currently make mistakes and show her what we do to try to fix them. Yet, she still holds on to a bit of the idea that she would like for it to be perfect. Sometimes, it seems it even stops her from trying, for fear of “failing” in her mind.

I suppose when you’re six years old, it’s difficult to balance the desire to do your best and simultaneously accept the fact that your best may not be perfect. It’s a process, learning not to be perfect. A process that requires us to put our own flaws out on display in order to show her that even those she looks to for answers are nowhere near perfect.

These days, instead of saying, “practice makes perfect,” we say, “practice makes better.” It’s our new mantra.

How do you help your kids overcome the fear of failure and accept that mistakes are ok, or even good?

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Image © ModernMami.com

“Change is good,” I recently told my six-year-old. “It often means you’re progressing and moving forward.” These days I am finding the need to remind myself of this as I watch my sweet baby girl become less baby and more girl. The change is there, staring me straight in the face and taunting my motherly need to keep her a baby.

It’s odd to have your own words playing back to you, reminding you that her growing up and becoming a little girl as opposed to a preschooler is indeed, a good thing. It means she’s growing as she should, developmentally and physically. It means life is progressing and we have much to be thankful for – a healthy daughter and days full of life.

Still…she’s my baby girl and will always be my baby, no matter how much taller than me she gets. I imagine this is somewhat how my own mami felt as I got older. Of course, it’s only now that I understand.

I sit and watch my daughter and can see how her body is physically changing to prepare for what’s to come in a few years. I see how her personality is solidifying and her beliefs forming. I see the change, little by little, and wonder what change will come next.

Her questions and curiosity show signs of her interests: a little bit of science, math, and the arts. It’s a little scary how close to a perfect mix this is of my husband and I. Will that too change one day? Will she eventually lose her ability to see the small things? Just how much of her will change?

In science, it is said that by merely observing an object, you alter the results of your experiment. I sometimes wonder how much of her I’m changing with each word I say.

Disclosure: This story is sponsored by Hallmark through their Life is a Special Occasion campaign. As always, all stories and opinions are my own. To receive special offers and discounts from Hallmark, sign up for their e-newsletter!

Photo copyright Melanie Edwards & ModernMami.com

Wow. A lot has been going on the past three weeks! Life has been hectic, to say the least; it’s been crazy, busy, and challenging…but, not bad.

It all started with a minor family emergency that led to me staying overnight at my parents’ house to care for my father, who as you may know has dementia. My children and I stayed with him two nights and learned the ins-and-outs of caring for someone with dementia full-time, something my mother does daily. After the initial two nights, the situation changed from staying overnight to going to their house every day to help both of them.

The challenge? My everyday routine of working with two kids at home had to be adjusted to working with two kids at my parents’ house and helping my parents with everyday tasks. Did you get all that?

As I said, it’s been crazy. But, not impossible. Somehow we’ve managed and three weeks later, I can say that I believe I’ve managed to keep up with the most important tasks of work, spend time with the kids, help my parents, and even have a little family fun. While I know there are areas that need improvement and tasks I’d like to do, but haven’t been able to complete, overall I feel we’re getting through this rough patch. So, what has helped?

5 Musts for Dealing with Unexpected Curve Balls in Life

1. Support
   My husband, bless his heart, has been very understanding, supportive, and flexible. He has helped a lot by taking care of things at our own house, and picking up the kids when I’ve had to stay later at my parents’, etc. Just knowing he understands the situation has been helpful enough.
2. Flexibility
   Going with the flow or rolling with the punches – however you want to say it, the point is to be flexible. Regardless of how much planning you do to try to keep you on-task, something may throw your plan out the window. This is important for the kids too, who all too often have had to just go along with what the day threw at us. I kept reminding my daughter that the important part was we were all together, and that somehow we’d make it work.
3. Say no
   I’ve had to say no to some things – events, varying requests, and the like. It’s impossible to be everywhere all the time and do everything. Saying no to extras allowed me to stay on task.
4. Focus on the ‘musts’
   Along with saying no, I’ve tried to focus on the ‘musts’ and put aside the less important tasks. For my work, this meant focusing on meeting deadlines and paid work, and spending less time on social media interaction and promotion. Though both important, I had to really consider if it was time well spent.
5. Humor
   Above all, being able to laugh and keep a good attitude about things has allowed us to stay sane. Seeing the humor in a situation always helps. This also helped show my kids that we can have fun regardless of where we are or how many challenges we’re dealing with.

How do you normally deal with life’s curve balls?

Photo: John Morgan/Flickr

I started out my week with the full intention of taking the kids to a local indoor play center and getting some work done while they played. Unfortunately, when we got there, the set up of the space wasn’t quite what I had imagined. I was unable to sit down and work. Instead I ended up chasing my 1-year-old around, especially since there were other small kids there. If I had been there only with my 6-year-old, it wouldn’t have been an issue; she would have played alone and enjoyed her time. My Monday ended up being a day of getting no work done. But, the kids had fun!

That’s the way things go sometimes, right? We set out with plans to get something done and the day just doesn’t work out the way we wanted it to. Many times it’s frustrating; I know I can be bad about letting it get to me. But, in the end, there’s usually not much you can do about it. You just have to roll with the punches. You can either try to change your day’s plans to fit what life has thrown you or rehash the events and frustration. Don’t get me wrong – this is something I have to constantly remind myself. I do try my best, though, especially since I want to set a good example for my baby girl.

“The sun’ll come out
Tomorrow
Bet your bottom dollar
That tomorrow
There’ll be sun!”

These lyrics from the Annie soundtrack have become an important part of my conversations with her recently. I didn’t even do it on purpose. After watching the movie with her one day, she asked to check out the soundtrack from the library. As we listened to the CD in the car, I asked her if she knew what Annie meant in saying the sun would come out tomorrow. She didn’t, so I explained it to her. Ever since then, whenever she gets frustrated about something or disappointed about a part of her day, I remind her what Annie said. “The sun will come out tomorrow, remember?” She smiles and says, “Yes, I remember. Tomorrow’s another day!” And, so it is.

Photo: James Jordan/Flickr

Three weeks of travel can certainly throw you for a loop. One one hand, I was able to attend two conferences and attend a brand event, so business-wise, they were good trips. On the other hand, I’m internally off-balance after traveling three weeks in a row.

Good and bad. There were plenty of good things about these trips and I don’t regret for a second going on any of them. But, as is true with much in life, with the good comes the bad.

The Good

• I was very lucky to have been able to take my family along for both conferences. Though I was mostly attending the conferences, I did get to see them in the mornings and nights. This helped ease the “miss you” moments for both the kids and myself.
• I was able to meet new people, have great conversations, and learn from all three trips.
• I had time to reflect on several things and take advantage of some quiet time to be able to just think.
• I was able to learn more about this brand and find ways we can possibly work together in the future.
• I came home from the most recent trip feeling more calm and full of ideas, rather than feeling just tired. I’m still tired, but the feeling was lessened.

The Bad

• My routine was thrown off and is still off.
• I’m still catching up on work.
• My family missed me, and I missed them.
• My daughter, in particular, was affected by the most recent trip and shed some tears in class because she missed me.
• My head is spinning a bit from being in many places within such a short time, but in a good kind of way.

None of this is extreme or unmanageable. My girl’s classroom situation really affected me the day I received notice from her teacher. But, after talking with her about it and thinking it through, I realized that at least she was able to express her thoughts. I explained to her that it’s absolutely normal to feel that way and that I too missed her. She also realizes these trips are part of my work and describes them as such. I feel it’s good for her to see this side of me in addition to the other roles she sees me play at home.

There are months where I go without any travel, so in the end, all things even out. How do you balance out the good and the bad of business travel?

Photo: Highways Agency/Flickr

Today, I want to share a quote I read not too long ago that I think is worth learning, studying, and remembering.

Imagine life is a game in which you are juggling five balls. The balls are called work, family, health, friends, and integrity. And you’re keeping all of them in the air. But one day you finally come to understand that work is a rubber ball. If you drop it, it will bounce back. The other four balls—family, health, friends, integrity—are made of glass. If you drop one of these, it will be irrevocably scuffed, nicked, perhaps even shattered. And once you truly understand the lesson of the five balls, you will have the beginnings of balance in your life. – The Secret to Attaining Work-Life Balance

Feel free to discuss your thoughts on this passage in the comments below.  I hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Photo: Lee Jordan

Last week, I attended the Blissdom 2012 conference in Nashville, TN. Amongst all the sessions related to business and social media, there were also sessions on life development. I felt this was important because all too often we get caught up on taking care of business, that we forget to take care of ourselves. One session I attended was titled “The Present Principle: How to be Present in a Demanding World” and was led by Claire Díaz Ortiz. In addition to an inspiring story from a young man she met in Kenya, Claire provided us with her seven-step manifesto for living in the present each day. Paraphrased from her talk and the notes I took, I share with you Claire’s seven steps to life in the now. You can download the original from her site.

Seven Steps to Living in the Present: Claire Díaz Ortiz’s Present Principle

1. P – Pray/Pause/Peace: It doesn’t matter what you call it, the point is to have a quiet moment first thing in the morning.
2. R – Read: This isn’t just about reading anything, but instead means to read in the sense of studying. Study a passage, a poem, or something that will give you inspiration.
3. E – Express: Take what you’ve studied and express what you’ve read, whether through writing in a journal, drawing, or some other form of creativity.
4. S – Schedule: Scan your day, mind map your thoughts, and put everything you’ve got going on in your head out on paper.
5. E – Exercise: Any movement will do, whether just a quick walk, more rigorous exercise, or simply dancing around your house. The idea is to get your body moving.
6. N – Nourish: Do something that will give you life. This can mean different things for everyone, but it can be reading (for fun), baking, crafting, etc.
7. T – Track: Take inventory of how your day went. How did you do? What did you miss? What did you forget? What can be better tomorrow?

Claire explained that she wrote this seven step guide as a reminder for herself, since she doesn’t always live in the present. It is important to note that Claire begins her day early in the morning, as she finds that is when she has the most time to be able to work on herself.

Do you feel that living in the present is something you need to work on? Do you think such a reminder will help you to live a more present life?

Weren’t able to make it to Blissdom this year? You can get access to the recorded sessions here!

Photo: Evil Erin

“I guess some weeks have to be bad.”

Those were the words my husband said this morning in response to me saying, “Oh, and last week was so good too!” I said that because yesterday I wasn’t feeling very well, then last night we had a really rough night with baby boy, and we’re exhausted. This is a dangerous combination that’s pretty much going to guarantee today will be hard to get through. I really needed a decent night’s sleep to get over how I was feeling yesterday so as to not repeat the cycle.

Quite the opposite, last week was good both personally and for my family. I was productive in work, we maintained our house’s condition, spent some nice family time together, and had a good week overall. I felt centered with my work-life balance. One day into this week, and we’re not off to a similar start.

My husband’s words got me thinking that the universe has a way of balancing itself. Just as it is said that for every good, there is a bad, perhaps we need to undergo imbalance to acknowledge when we do have balance in our lives. In order to appreciate life balance, we need to get through those days, or even weeks that aren’t so smooth. I suppose as long as you don’t let it consume you and learn to bounce back, it’s fine. We need to learn from those off days and be flexible. It’s apparent to me, yet again, that work life balance is a fluid and ever-changing concept.

Today I will try to have a better day despite my words and attitude early this morning. If I still don’t feel it’s a balanced day, I will take the time to think about what went right and be thankful for that. Then, I’ll try again tomorrow.

I’m learning that balance requires an ongoing effort.

How do you get past those days or weeks where your work-life balance is thrown off?

Photo by Raphaël Labbé