Wow. A lot has been going on the past three weeks! Life has been hectic, to say the least; it’s been crazy, busy, and challenging…but, not bad.

It all started with a minor family emergency that led to me staying overnight at my parents’ house to care for my father, who as you may know has dementia. My children and I stayed with him two nights and learned the ins-and-outs of caring for someone with dementia full-time, something my mother does daily. After the initial two nights, the situation changed from staying overnight to going to their house every day to help both of them.

The challenge? My everyday routine of working with two kids at home had to be adjusted to working with two kids at my parents’ house and helping my parents with everyday tasks. Did you get all that?

As I said, it’s been crazy. But, not impossible. Somehow we’ve managed and three weeks later, I can say that I believe I’ve managed to keep up with the most important tasks of work, spend time with the kids, help my parents, and even have a little family fun. While I know there are areas that need improvement and tasks I’d like to do, but haven’t been able to complete, overall I feel we’re getting through this rough patch. So, what has helped?

5 Musts for Dealing with Unexpected Curve Balls in Life

1. Support
   My husband, bless his heart, has been very understanding, supportive, and flexible. He has helped a lot by taking care of things at our own house, and picking up the kids when I’ve had to stay later at my parents’, etc. Just knowing he understands the situation has been helpful enough.
2. Flexibility
   Going with the flow or rolling with the punches – however you want to say it, the point is to be flexible. Regardless of how much planning you do to try to keep you on-task, something may throw your plan out the window. This is important for the kids too, who all too often have had to just go along with what the day threw at us. I kept reminding my daughter that the important part was we were all together, and that somehow we’d make it work.
3. Say no
   I’ve had to say no to some things – events, varying requests, and the like. It’s impossible to be everywhere all the time and do everything. Saying no to extras allowed me to stay on task.
4. Focus on the ‘musts’
   Along with saying no, I’ve tried to focus on the ‘musts’ and put aside the less important tasks. For my work, this meant focusing on meeting deadlines and paid work, and spending less time on social media interaction and promotion. Though both important, I had to really consider if it was time well spent.
5. Humor
   Above all, being able to laugh and keep a good attitude about things has allowed us to stay sane. Seeing the humor in a situation always helps. This also helped show my kids that we can have fun regardless of where we are or how many challenges we’re dealing with.

How do you normally deal with life’s curve balls?

Photo: John Morgan/Flickr

“I guess some weeks have to be bad.”

Those were the words my husband said this morning in response to me saying, “Oh, and last week was so good too!” I said that because yesterday I wasn’t feeling very well, then last night we had a really rough night with baby boy, and we’re exhausted. This is a dangerous combination that’s pretty much going to guarantee today will be hard to get through. I really needed a decent night’s sleep to get over how I was feeling yesterday so as to not repeat the cycle.

Quite the opposite, last week was good both personally and for my family. I was productive in work, we maintained our house’s condition, spent some nice family time together, and had a good week overall. I felt centered with my work-life balance. One day into this week, and we’re not off to a similar start.

My husband’s words got me thinking that the universe has a way of balancing itself. Just as it is said that for every good, there is a bad, perhaps we need to undergo imbalance to acknowledge when we do have balance in our lives. In order to appreciate life balance, we need to get through those days, or even weeks that aren’t so smooth. I suppose as long as you don’t let it consume you and learn to bounce back, it’s fine. We need to learn from those off days and be flexible. It’s apparent to me, yet again, that work life balance is a fluid and ever-changing concept.

Today I will try to have a better day despite my words and attitude early this morning. If I still don’t feel it’s a balanced day, I will take the time to think about what went right and be thankful for that. Then, I’ll try again tomorrow.

I’m learning that balance requires an ongoing effort.

How do you get past those days or weeks where your work-life balance is thrown off?

Photo by Raphaël Labbé

Yesterday was one of those days I wish I could repeat – everything flowed, things got done, balance was had. It’s amazing how one day going smoothly can lift your spirits and motivate you to make it happen again.

Because I had such a great day, I feel like I need to record it. Sometimes you have to sit back and remind yourself of all that went good – little or big. Though this is simple in the grand scheme of things, having a day where work, family, and personal time were in-line is definitely something to celebrate.

We are often striving to create work-life balance, and I talk about it quite often, so I absolutely want to share with you the specifics of how my day went. I hope that by doing so, you will see a glimpse of your own day or find some ideas for small changes you can make in your routine. With that, I share my perfectly balanced day and what I hope will become a regular daily routine for achieving work-life balance in my life.

Personal Daily Routine for Work-Life Balance

6 am: Woke up with hugs from baby boy and baby girl. After a bit of snuggling, dragged myself out of bed and began the morning routine of getting dressed and making sure baby girl got ready for school.

7:30 am: Breakfast time for both kids before heading out the door.

8-8:30 am: Dropped baby girl off at school.

8:30-9 am: Baby boy fell asleep on the ride back home, so waited in driveway for him to take a short nap while reading emails and checking in on Twitter and Facebook on my phone. I also found photo to use in blog post.

9:15-9:45 am: Took out some frozen already-cooked turkey to thaw for dinner. Then, while baby boy sat in his high chair with a snack, did my morning workout to Just Dance 3.

9:45-10:30 am: Ate breakfast, hung out with baby boy, and worked on blog post draft.

10:30-10:45 am: Phone call with client.

10:45-11:30 am: Finished and published blog post. Proceeded to work on marketing it via Facebook, Twitter, and StumbleUpon. Also, posted updates to various social media platforms and groups.

11:30 am – 12 pm: Played with baby boy and continued miscellaneous work on email and social media monitoring.

12 noon: Lunch for baby boy and myself.

12:30-2:30 pm: Continued work in-between playing with baby boy. When he played quietly on the floor, I’d check email or read articles, blog posts, etc. We went back and forth during this time quite a bit.

2:30-3 pm: Picked up baby girl from school

3-4:30 pm: Baby boy fell asleep on the ride home, so baby girl and I took this opportunity to have a tea party and afternoon snack. While she set up the tea party and changed into a princess outfit, I began cooking a turkey soup for dinner. I had enough time to shred the turkey, add all other ingredients and set the pot to simmer, plus sit down with baby girl for a princess tea party and snack before baby boy woke up.

4:30-5 pm: After a quick snack for baby boy, he and his big sister played together and watched TV alone. I ran upstairs to back up some files on our main computer and freshen myself up for the evening.

5-6 pm: Hung out with the kids, fed baby boy dinner, and picked up clutter in the living room. Baby boy got a little fussy during this time too.

6-7:30 pm: After my husband came home, we sat down for dinner, along with baby girl. Afterwards, the kids hung out with daddy and I cleaned up the kitchen.

7:30-8 pm: Bath/shower time for all.

8-8:40 pm: The husband read baby girl her bedtime story and tucked her in while I helped baby boy relax and fall asleep. Some nights baby boy falls asleep quickly, but with the afternoon nap he had, it took a while for him to calm down.

8:45-11 pm: With the kids in bed, the husband and I were finally able to hang out, talk about our days, and watch a little TV before heading to bed ourselves.

The reason this day worked out so great for me is that I felt accomplished. I was able to work on various areas of my life – not just work or just family. I was productive, got work done, spent time with the family, and even took time for myself.

Of course, not every day will work out so great. I know there will be days where baby boy won’t take two naps or will need more attention due to fussiness. There will be days when I’ll need to run errands and I won’t be able to get as much work done. That’s fine. We have to be flexible, right? The important thing is to remember days like these where all did go well and try to replicate them by following a routine as much as possible.

Why don’t you take some time to write out your daily schedule and reflect on what works and what you can improve? Where can you make some changes to your routine to ease the fluidity of the day?

Other articles you may like:

• Sample Daily Routine for Work at Home Mom
• 7 Ways to Find ‘Me Time’

Photos by Vicente Villamón, Andreanna Moya, Robin, and Erica Firment

When I was in my early 20s, I put it in my mind that I wanted to have a job that would allow me to be available and at home with my future child. That is the reason I chose real estate as my career. Fast forward fifteen years later, I found myself as a single mom when my only son was two years old. Obviously, being divorced was not part of my vision, but the career choice helped me to focus on my main intent which also included being able to pick up my son at school every day.

Little did I know how difficult it would be to balance my life at home with my work when real estate sales meant you are on call at any time of the day including weekends. Luckily, whenever I found myself stressed, I remembered my goal of being with my son whenever I wanted to. That one priority is what helped me to stay grounded and in the flow of enjoying an immeasurable amount of moments that I constantly cherish in my heart.

As the years went by, I was offered opportunities to work in large commercial firms which I know would have led me to more money. Life is constantly presenting us with choices. I sometimes wish I would have made more money at certain points in my life because I would have been more prepared when the economy changed.

Today’s economic environment brings additional challenges to many families who have to reinvent themselves to stay afloat due to job loss. It causes much more stress and uncertainty. I know, because I have had to live this as the sole provider of my household in a field that was first hit in the economy.

That is why it is imperative in these days to stay focused on your own well being so that your children feel secure. I sincerely believe that security from within will eventually lead you to better opportunities. There is a delicate balancing act when faced with anxiety and I can’t say I have all the answers because there were many times when I was ready to pull my hair out.

But then I remembered my focus: enjoying time with my son, laughing with him, instilling values of self worth and strength of character. And you know what? We survived and am proud to say that he is a confident young seventeen year old man ready to take on college this year, spread his wings and look forward to his future.

I have absolutely no regrets of my choice to make nurturing and love a priority because I feel fulfilled in my role as a mother. In hindsight, all the other roles I had to juggle were secondary. The abundant time I spent with him was priceless and more valuable than having a million dollars in my bank account.

So now that I am about to become an empty nester, my greatest pearl of wisdom is to get out of the house when you are ready to go ARGHHHH, stick the kids in the car and go enjoy a moment in the park and always communicate positive affirmations with them. You might be surprised one day, when they replay all those good thoughts back to you when you least expect it, and they end up uplifting YOU. When this happened to me, I guarantee you, I had the biggest smile ever!

Photo courtesy of Blanca Stella

Just when I started feeling like I had a bit of a handle on this work-life balance thing, I will be needing to redefine, readjust, and re-prioritize, well everything, in the coming weeks. Our second child will soon be here and come early December, the balance in our house will be thrown out the door. At least, until we’re able to come up with a new routine and schedule for the various aspects of our lives.

I am fully aware that life will be changing in many ways now that our family of three will be a family of four. But, I don’t think that anything can truly prepare you until you’re in the midst of it and able to assess just what adjustments need to be made. It’s much like when you have the first baby – people can tell you their experiences, advice, and tips for how your life will change, but you don’t really know until that baby is in your house.

However, with a business to run, two blogs, and oh yeah, a family and house to manage, I can’t help but try to prepare myself ahead of time. If anything, it at least gives me some peace of mind to know that I tried. That counts, right?

My plan?

• Business: I am doing as much as I can now to line up plans so that I am in a good spot for taking a few weeks off. Once I’m past the initial period of adjustment, I hope to come back to pick up right where I left off with minimal catch-up needed.
• Blogs: I’m trying my best to write extra posts that I can schedule for the coming months. I am also seeking contributors that I can highlight with guest posts, in order to keep content running while I’m on maternity leave. (Email me if you’re interested in contributing with a guest post, or two, or three.) And, of course, I’m trusting that all of you will fully understand and stick with me if there’s a slow down in posts during that time.
• Family: We have already been preparing our baby girl with several talks and mentions of a) how she can help when her baby brother arrives and b) that there may be times we will not be able to rush to cater to her need at that moment. I know that family members will also be around to help – I’m lucky to live near my mom. So, between my husband, myself, and the help of family, I am confident that we’ll be able to adjust to the new dynamics with minor adjustments.
• House: Since our baby boy will be here very very soon, we are in what we call “crunch time mode.” My husband has been working hard to get the house clean, rearranging and reorganizing certain areas, since my very pregnant self is of no use these days and can barely bend at this point. I also intend to work out a menu plan with my husband, full of easy meals he can cook if need be and meals that can serve for two or three dinners (perhaps with some re-purposing).

I know that all of this planning doesn’t mean that our life after the baby is born will undergo a smooth, worry-free, and uncomplicated transition. I realize there will be unexpected circumstances and changes. Still, I hope that some of this planning will ease some of the transitions and allow us to deal with the unexpected without needing to worry about those aspects of our lives that we can, in fact, control at this moment.

Do you have any tips to share for transitioning and welcoming a second child into the family?