Happy Three Kings’ Day! Feliz Dí­a de los Tres Reyes Magos!

We did it. Last year, after not celebrating, I resolved to celebrate Three Kings’ Day this year. And, though it’s a normal work day and baby girl is at preschool today, she did get her gift this morning and participated in the traditional Three Kings’ Day celebration.

It’s nice for me to share this tradition with her and remember my own childhood memories of celebrating El Día de Los Reyes. I remember making my basket with my family, filling it with grass on La Víspera de Reyes (the Eve of Three Kings’ Day), and being excited the next morning when I found the grass had been replaced with candy and the kings had also left me a gift.

There was one particular year that I remember vividly because I did something that I regret to this day. I can remember that I wanted one of those Barbie motorcycles; I think they were a hot item back then. When I opened my gift, it was a Barbie scooter instead, or maybe it was a moped. What I know is that it wasn’t the motorcycle I wanted. And I said, in my little whiny voice too, “Esto no es lo que yo queria!” (This isn’t what I wanted!) I was of course quickly reprimanded and told to appreciate what the kings had brought me because other kids may not have gotten anything. But, I can still remember my mami‘s face right before she scolded me. When I was old enough and learned that my parents were the ones that actually provided the gifts and that it wasn’t actually Los Reyes, I felt horrible. I know that I apologized to my mom at one point or another, maybe even multiple times. I will probably apologize again today and we’ll laugh it off.

So, how do we celebrate Three Kings’ Day? I believe that each Latino culture has their own special way of celebrating Three Kings’ Day. I can only tell you how we personally celebrated Los Tres Reyes in Puerto Rico and what I am passing down to my children so they can learn about the tradition.

Traditions for Celebrating Three Kings’ Day (El Día de los Tres Reyes Magos)

1. First, you will need either a plain shoebox or a basket made from a shoebox. Here are the baskets my kids will be using this weekend, made by their abuela:
   
   The basket is normally decorated with bows made out of wax paper, but we’ve had trouble finding such paper. So, in the past, we’ve also used regular wrapping paper.
2. Then, the night before Three Kings’ Day, on La Vispera de Reyes – have your child collect some grass from your yard and put it in the basket. The grass is for the kings’ camels. This is analogous to setting out milk & cookies for Santa or carrots for his reindeer.
3. The basket then goes under the bed (or next to it if it doesn’t fit).
4. In the middle of the night, after your child is sleeping, throw out the grass and replace it with candy. Place a gift next to the basket.
5. The next morning, your child will be delighted to find the gift and candy that the Three Kings left behind!
6. Don’t forget to explain that Los Tres Reyes left a gift for him/her the same way they brought gifts for baby Jesus when he was born. That is the meaning behind all this and why we celebrate the holiday.

Los Tres Reyes (Three Kings’ Day) is a fun holiday and one I plan to continue celebrating each year so my kids can create their own memories and embrace this Latino tradition.

Have you ever celebrated El Día de Los Tres Reyes? Do you think you might next year?

Top photo: Cryo Mariena/Flickr

Yesterday on Twitter, the hashtag #101HispanicWaystoDie was trending and full of tweets poking fun at Latino culture. My friend Tracy alerted me to the hashtag and also wrote about it, and how she contributed with her own light-hearted tweets. Her Vicks VapoRub tweet brought back memories and had me laughing.

But, something I noticed as I initially took a peek at the hashtag and scrolled through the tweets, was the abundant commentary about Black people. It was something Tracy and I discussed a bit after reading various tweets. As Tracy mentioned in her post, one girl wrote “say you’re going out with a moreno” and countless more retweeted and favorited her tweet. Other similar tweets included, “Bringing a Black boyfriend home,” and “Changing your parents music in the car to ‘musica de negros’.” It seems that whether in English, Spanish, or even Spanglish, and regardless of the terminology (Black, moreno, negro), the sentiment of many was the same: their parents were not accepting of Black people or culture – or at least they felt this was true.

Now admittedly, many of the tweets came from young people (teens even?), judging solely by the tiny Twitter avatar. I know young kids can be overly dramatic, but were their words a sign of something bigger in Latino culture – something we should really discuss as a community?

I’ll be super honest and share that growing up, I did observe some of this behavior. Sadly, I heard comments similar to those tweeted and that included phrases like “esos morenos,” always from the older generation. It never sat right with me, even at a young age when I didn’t truly understand.

I’ve always wondered why comments and feelings like that existed, but then I would be called “negra linda” and complimented on my beautiful trigueño skin color. It didn’t, and still doesn’t, make sense. Of course, this was all part of my personal experience growing up. I cannot say this is a general occurrence in Latino culture, but do feel it’s worth exploring. Clearly, many in the newer generation still feel it’s a problem, even if they were jokingly tweeting out their feelings of #101HispanicWaystoDie.

Photo: John Steven Fernandez/Flickr

“Generalizations are necessary to understand the world we live in.”

The above statement was from a tweet I received the other day in response to my article about ¡Q’Viva! The Chosen. My article focused on how the show is highlighting Latinos in a positive way and I wrote that they’re sharing Latino culture on TV without the stereotypes. In response to my tweet about the article, someone wrote back that I should have specified “negative stereotypes” and then continued the tweet with the sentence above.

It took me a couple of times of reading the tweet to understand what she was saying. But, it took a bit longer for me to fully think about it, process it, and figure out how I truly felt about the statement. My initial reaction was “What? Stereotypes are inherently negative!” After thinking more about it and discussing with a friend, I realized that not all stereotypes are necessarily negative, though I still believe that the act of stereotyping is a negative thing. Did you get all that?

What I mean to say is that stereotypical statements such as, “Latinas are good dancers,” (to use an example my friend gave me) may not be negative in and of themselves since they are not saying anything bad about the group. This is not the same type of stereotype as saying “Puerto Ricans are drug dealers,” which is saying something negative about a group. However, the fact that a group is being generalized about in the first place is a negative thing. So, even saying that Latinas are good dancers is still a negative thing, in my opinion. Also, think of those poor Latinas who may not, in fact, be good dancers!

To address the second part of the tweet I received, which is the quote at the beginning of this post – why exactly are generalizations necessary? Are we not able to live without them? Must we have generalizations in order to get along with each other and coexist? I really don’t believe that.

We’ve become so accustomed to labels that perhaps it feels as if they’re necessary. But, are they really? I’m guilty of it myself and know that I feed into some stereotypes too. I’m not saying I’m without fault. But, I truly don’t believe that generalizations, or stereotypes, are necessary for our society.

I invite you to join this discussion and share your thoughts with me in the comments below. Are generalizations/stereotypes necessary to understand our world? Please keep it civilized and do not take this as an opportunity to bash others. I will be closely monitoring the discussion and will not allow any statements that are not necessary for the discussion.

Photo: David Childers/Flickr

Last year I had the opportunity to host a Kellogg’s Love Your Cereal breakfast with friends and family. We learned more about Kellogg’s cereals and had a chance to ask questions directly from a Kellogg’s representative. This year, I’ve once again partnered with Kellogg’s and was part of the Ama Tu Cereal (Love Your Cereal) team they sponsored to the Blogalicious 2011 conference. I’m happy to partner with Kellogg’s again, as they’re a company that has been a part of my life since I can remember.

In Puerto Rico, and throughout much of the Caribbean and Latin America, we have a bad habit of calling things by the most popular name brand that makes it. So, for example, all pain killers are Tylenol, regardless of the actual brand. Likewise, for much of my childhood I heard my mami saying, “Quieres con fleik?” which translates to “Do you want some corn flakes?” It didn’t matter that she might have been talking about Frosted Flakes instead. Another way we referenced Frosted Flakes in our house was to simply call it “El Tigre” (The Tiger), due to Tony the Tiger of course! To this day, Frosted Flakes is still my brother’s favorite cereal and it’s probably my husband’s too.

As part of my work with the Kellogg’s Ama Tu Cereal team at Blogalicious, I helped provide information on how Latina moms responded to Kellogg’s Breakfast in America survey. The survey found that 9 out of 10 Latina moms want their kids to eat breakfast every day, but unfortunately, 40% said their kids did not. However, almost 40% did say they ensure their children have breakfast daily. Additionally, Latina moms are 20% more likely than moms overall to get up early to prepare their children’s breakfast. And, it was found that Latina moms are 17% more likely than moms overall to say their family brings breakfast to work or school.

I know that it gets hectic in the morning as the entire household works to get ready for school and work. I admit that my husband and I are not good about eating breakfast and most days skip it. However, we make sure baby girl eats breakfast every day. It’s not always fancy, and sometimes it is a bowl of cereal, but she always eats something in the morning.

What are some favorite breakfast foods for your family?

Disclosure: Kellogg’s was a sponsor for the Blogalicious 2011 conference and I was compensated for my work.

Cereal photo: Mike Johnson – TheBusyBrain.com

Last month I shared information with you about my role in the Check-in for Checkups campaign and the goal of the program. As a reminder, the Check-in for Checkups program was designed to help the Children’s Health Fund provide health checkups to children in need. The idea is that for every healthy habit shared on checkinforcheckups.com, Clorox donates $.10 to the Children’s Health Fund, up to $100,000.

Personally, I think this is a great program and love that it benefits children. I know there are plenty of struggling families out there, so providing health checkups is extremely important, especially for the children of such families.

Health Checkups for Latinos

Though I know families of all ethnicities are affected by the economy and assisted by the Children’s Health Fund, I was curious to know how the Latino community in particular has benefited from the Children’s Health Fund. Here is some information I was provided regarding their work within the Latino community.

• In 2010, overall, 43.6% of the Children’s Health Fund’s national network patients were Hispanic.
• The highest incidence of Hispanic patients were in the following regions:
  • Southern Arizona — 90% Hispanic
  • Los Angeles — 84%  Hispanic
  • Austin, TX — 78% Hispanic
  • South Florida/South Bronx, NY — 68% Hispanic

I was also informed that the Children’s Health Fund provides some of their Health Education materials in Spanish. While the page itself is not in Spanish, the linked titles and materials are.

Small Steps Towards Healthy Habits

Since my participation in the Check-in for Checkups program began, I’ve noticed that I’m more conscious of when my family and I accomplish a healthy habit, even if it’s small. The fact that I can share my healthy habits and benefit the Children’s Health Fund (either with a tweet or via checkinforcheckups.com) definitely helps me recognize when we do something healthy. I commend my daughter when she chooses water over juice. I point out if we walk a significant distance. I feel proud if I eat more vegetables in a day. These small steps count and will help our family build long-term healthy habits; and that’s something to be happy about.

ModernMami™.com Reader Giveaway

The Check-in for Checkups campaign has also partnered with Bethenny Frankel, and we’ve got an autographed copy of Bethenny Frankel’s book, A Place of Yes, for one of you! See details below.

How to Enter

Required entry: If you’d like to enter this contest, simply leave a comment below sharing one of your healthy habits. *While you’re at it, why not head over to checkinforcheckups.com and share it there as well?! (Not required to enter giveaway, but doing so will give the Children’s Health Fund $.10!)

Extra entries (optional):
Each of the following will count as 1 extra entry. You’ll need to leave a separate comment for each entry.

1. Follow @modernmami on Twitter.
2. Tweet the following: Enter to win signed copy of @Bethenny Frankel book from @modernmami & learn abt #checkinforcheckups! http://bit.ly/pla97Q #giveaway #contest
3. Tweet your healthy habit using the #checkinforcheckups hashtag.
4. Receive post updates by subscribing to our RSS feed. You can do so either via email or through a RSS reader. Leave a comment saying you did so or are already a subscriber.
5. Subscribe on friendfeed and leave a comment with your friendfeed ID.
6. Like ModernMami™.com on Facebook.
7. Write a blog post on your own blog sharing the details of this contest. Be sure to include a link back to this post. Leave a comment with your post link.

All entries must be in by Friday, September 16, 2011 at 11:59 pm EST. You must be 18 or older and a U.S. resident. No purchase necessary. Remember to leave a separate comment for each entry. The winner will be chosen using Random.org and will be notified via email. (Please be sure to provide a valid email address with your entry.) Winner will have 48 hours to respond and claim prize, otherwise a new winner will be chosen. See rules and promotions standards set forth by Clorox for more information: http://www.clorox.com/legal/promotions/

Disclosure: I am currently working on a compensated campaign with The Clorox Company for the Check-in for Checkups program that benefits the Children’s Health Fund.

Last month I attended a McDonald’s First Taste event in New York City. The event was designed for media and bloggers to be able to sample some new menu items, meet with key McDonald’s representatives, and speak with McDonald’s nutrition manager and chef. We also had the opportunity to speak with a registered dietitian who focuses on nutrition in the Latino community.

While our family is not against fast food and do occasionally eat it, we realize that we need to be careful with our choices and monitor how much and how often we eat fast food. Attending the McDonald’s First Taste event allowed me to learn more about the various choices McDonald’s offers that will make a visit to the restaurant a more balanced visit, food-wise. I also learned about the Bag a McMeal section of the McDonald’s website, where you can choose menu items to create a more-balanced meal and monitor the nutritional information. This is good if you’re wanting to choose lower-calorie or lower-fat options from the McDonald’s menu before heading to your local McDonald’s. It definitely gives you a good perspective on what you may have been eating thus far and how you can choose better options.

I spoke with both Julia Braun, McDonald’s nutrition manager, and Sylvia Melendez-Klinger, an independent registered dietitian who focuses on nutrition in the Hispanic community. Both ladies provided insightful information regarding the McDonald’s menu. Check out the videos below to learn some tips from Sylvia on putting together a meal that meets your calorie needs, plus her take on what the Latino community can do to make healthier eating choices.

Sylvia Melendez-Klinger on Creating a Balanced Meal at McDonald’s

Sylvia Melendez-Klinger on How Latinos Can Eat Healthier

I also took the opportunity to ask Julia Braun about marketing to children at McDonald’s. Hear her response regarding McDonald’s stance on responsible marketing to children.

Julia Braun on Marketing to Children at McDonald’s

A couple of the new menu items we sampled included a mango pineapple smoothie, an Asian salad McDonald’s is bringing back for a limited time, and new sauces for the Chicken McNuggets, including a ranch sauce which will please my daughter who dips pretty much everything into ranch dressing. Of course, McDonald’s wants you to try out some of their new menu items, so they’re offering a giveaway to ModernMami™ readers with a gift card so you can do just that. Remember to also give the Bag a McMeal site a try and see what meal combinations you can come up with. Sylvia provided some tips on how you can even keep your meals around the 500 calorie mark. What 500-600 calorie meals can you create for a better fast food meal choice?

McDonald’s Gift Bag Giveaway

One Three* readers will win a McDonald’s gift bag, which contains the following items:
*Update 6/11/11: I’ve been told by the PR company that I can giveaway three bags instead of just one!

• Tips and recipes from Chef Dan
• Lavender scented eye mask
• Pineapple scented candle
• Mango scented candle
• Notebook with pen
• Bamboo pen
• Balance bracelet
• $25 McDonald’s Arch Card

How to Enter

Required entry: If you’d like to enter this contest, simply leave a comment below telling us which McDonald’s 600-calorie (or less) meal combination you prefer.

Extra entries (optional):

Each of the following will count as 1 extra entry. You’ll need to leave a separate comment for each entry.

1. Follow @modernmami on twitter.
2. Tweet the following: Enter to win a McDonald’s gift bag & gift card from @modernmami! http://bit.ly/lKjQxv #mcdonalds #giveaway #contest
3. Receive post updates by subscribing to our RSS feed. You can do so either via email or through a RSS reader. Leave a comment saying you did so or are already a subscriber.
4. Subscribe on friendfeed and leave a comment with your friendfeed ID.
5. Like ModernMami™.com on Facebook.
6. Write a blog post on your own blog sharing the details of this contest. Be sure to include a link back to this post. Leave a comment with your post link.

All entries must be in by Friday, June 17, 2011 at 11:59 pm EST. You must be 18 or older and have a valid U.S. address to enter. Remember to leave a separate comment for each entry. The winners will be chosen using Random.org and will be notified via email. (Please be sure to provide a valid email address with your entry.) Winners will have 48 hours to respond and claim prize, otherwise a new winner will be chosen.

Disclosure: I attended the McDonald’s First Taste event courtesy of VPE PR and McDonald’s. All expenses paid. No compensation received.

Photo credits: McDonald’s

“Es poca mujer.” These were words I heard at various points growing up and that have stuck with me. Literally it means “she’s not much of a woman,” but the phrase is used to mean a woman is not strong enough or cannot handle a situation. For example, if a woman is unable to handle her responsibilities as a mother, wife, and home manager, then some might say, “es poca mujer.”

The phrase has never been said about me, at least not to my face. I’ve heard it said by my mom, mostly, but also other family members in reference to other women we know. In all honesty, it seems like such a judgmental and harsh phrase to me. Of course, it goes back to something I’ve written about before – how in our Latino culture, women and moms especially, are somewhat expected to be super women. The result of not being able to balance it all is to be called out as “not good enough.”

Do you know how often I could be called “poca mujer” based on that definition? I try hard to get many things done and meet a lot of self-imposed expectations, but I would cringe if someone ever told me it wasn’t good enough. I can only do the best I can and really, who besides me can truly know what a successful day entails? Success for our family is probably different than it is for yours. So, for someone else to call me “poca mujer,” or to call anyone that, seems a bit cruel.

To me, saying “es poca mujer” about a woman is equivalent to calling her weak. And to call a woman weak because she is not able to keep up with so many aspects of her life – mainly those involving caring for others – well, it’s just wrong, isn’t it?

Are you familiar with the phrase? What are your thoughts on how it’s used?

Lately, I have been reflecting on some of the ways that I could expose my sons more to Latino culture. There are many ways that my husband and I model cultural practices at home such as the kinds of foods we cook and spices we use, the kinds of music we listen to, and the fact that we often speak to them in Spanish. However, I often wonder if all of this is enough. Sure, the boys know that they are Latino and that their parents and family are Latinos, but what exactly does that really mean to them?

My husband and I had totally different experiences than our sons growing up that better equipped us to truly understand and appreciate what being Latino means. I was raised in Spain by my grandparents until the age of 8 and spoke Spanish as my first language. My husband, who is of Puerto Rican and Cuban descent, was raised speaking Spanish at home here in the United States. He also lived and attended school in Puerto Rico for a number of years. There is really nothing that compares to being immersed in Latin culture and language by living in a native Spanish country. We learned exactly what it meant to be a Latino and the pride and culture of our people.

Our children are being raised here in the United States and are really Americanized at this point. They speak English fluently and prefer speaking English to their friends and in school. It seems like anything they value and understand is so removed from my fond memories of my childhood when it was a simpler time and we were bound together by our language and our cultural practices.  These days, young people think that eating rice and beans and listening to Reggaeton makes you a Latino, but there is so much more to us as a people.  It is the fabric of our culture that I am trying to impart to my children.  It is that pride that has propelled us through centuries of obstacles and strife.

I often wonder if I am doing a good job of passing on these cultural lessons and these feelings of pride to my boys.  Although we work very hard at home to instill these values in them, there are many things about our lifestyle that might be contradictory in the eyes of my children.  We live in an affluent neighborhood that is not very culturally diverse in terms of the ratio of Latino and African-American families to the Caucasian families that live here.  Actually, we are one of the few Latino families that live here and own our own home.  My children also attend a Parochial school close by that is not very culturally diverse.  As a matter of fact, there are only a handful of Latino children in both of my sons’ classes.

It’s almost as if the further we move away from our roots, the further we move away from the very things that we hold dear as Latinos, such as community and cultural unity.  As every new generation progresses, here in the United States, we are catapulted from those rich cultural practices of our past into the American way of life.  Most of us came here looking for opportunities and a better way of life and we definitely got those things.  Unfortunately, however, I believe that we somehow lost something along the way and it is this very thing, this essence of being Latin that is lacking in the younger generations.

That is why I am working very hard to raise my sons to be proud of whom they are and to be proud of being Latino.  I believe that you cannot know where you are going if you don’t know where it is that you came from.  It is not enough to remind my boys that they are Latin and to remind them that some of the things that we do are because we are Latin, we have to show them what it means to be a Latino.  Being a Latino includes a rich cultural heritage that is made up of an array of cultural practices that span across a vast network of native Spanish-speaking countries.  Although all Latinos do not originate from the same country, we have an unspoken brotherhood that binds us by way of a common language and a common history.  It is this pride and this brotherhood that I hope to teach my boys.  My hope is that my husband and I will be able to lay a foundation that will be strong enough to influence future generations of our family.  This is one of the legacies that we want to leave our children.

How do you maintain pride for your Latino heritage? If you have children, how do you help them feel proud of their Latino culture?

I’m very excited to share with you a new venture that I’ve been working on for months, but that just launched late last night! Ella Media is my marketing and consulting business, through which I’ll be connecting businesses with today’s digital Latina. Ella Media also provides digital marketing and consulting services for large brands, small businesses, and social media savvy women.

If you’re a digital Latina (Latina blogger, social media Latina, etc.) seeking fun campaigns that also value your time, then sign up to be considered for upcoming campaigns!

While you’re at it, how about also connecting with Ella Media?

• follow on twitter
• like on facebook

Why is this a need? You may remember that more and more Brands are Leveraging the Reach of Social Media Latinas. The Latinas in Social Media BlogHer 2010 panel also proved that brands and the PR agencies representing them are interested in marketing to Latinas and many times look to our community for help in doing so. It’s also evident that as bloggers we wish to be compensated for blogging and social media work, so why not work together to bring brands and Latina bloggers together?

I hope you’ll visit Ella Media and sign up. I’m really looking forward to growing my blogging community and expanding it to bring great opportunities your way.

Today is the first day of National Hispanic Heritage Month. Unlike other heritage months, where an actual calendar month is dedicated, Hispanic Heritage Month runs from September 15 – October 15 each year. This year’s theme is “Heritage, Diversity, Integrity and Honor: The Renewed Hope of America” and because my husband and I are big on our daughter learning about her heritage this is a great chance for us to expose her even more to her Latina half.

There are several events happening locally to celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month in Orlando, as I’m sure there are in many other cities across the nation. I’d also like to do some learning activities at home with her and will check with her preschool if they are planning to include anything in their curriculum during this next month. Of course, there are plenty of sites with activities, lesson plans, and information to help me celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with my preschooler. Here’s a few you can browse.

12 Resources to Celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with Your Kids

Lessons for Hispanic Heritage Month from Education World

Offers 12 activities to begin exploring Hispanic heritage. A brief description of each activity is provided, along with the appropriate grade-level.

Hispanic Heritage Month Resources from Colorín Colorado

Provides activities, information, ready-to-use tools, as well as lesson plans and book ideas.

Hispanic and Latino Heritage in Books for Children and Teens

Lists a variety of reading lists, award-winning books, and articles featuring books for children and teens that focus on Hispanic and Latino heritage and other themes.

Hispanic-Heritage Resources for Teachers (or parents)

Though this site was written with teachers in mind, any parent can use the lesson plans, printables, activities, and references provided.

Celebrate Hispanic Heritage on NickJr.com

Includes various activities, ideas, and recipes featuring NickJr.com characters – perfect for preschoolers.

Hispanic Heritage Month Book List on PBS

List of Spanish-language or bilingual books to share with your child.

Celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with Maya & Miguel on PBS Kids

Celebrate the contributions of Hispanic Americans to the United States with Maya & Miguel of PBS Kids.

Hispanic Heritage Month Party on Playhouse Disney

Throw a party to celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with Handy Manny! Page includes recipes, games, activities, and party checklists.

Celebrate Hispanic Heritage from Scholastic

Information on Latinos in history, famous Latinos, and Hispanics in the Americas.

National Hispanic Heritage Month Activities from Crayola

Coloring pages, crafts, and ecards to enjoy with your children.

Hispanic Heritage Teaching Resources from Smithsonian Education

Lots of resources, including information on carnivals and masks, Latino families, music, and art.

Hispanic Heritage Free Resources from Gale

Includes Spanish-language eBooks and a range of resources to help users study and celebrate Hispanic Heritage.

Do you plan to celebrate Hispanic Heritage Month with your child(ren)? What are some activities you plan to do?